


The Heat Swan Queen AU

by PipexVauseman



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Movie Fusion, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, Minor Violence, Mystery Stories, Non-Canonical, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Some Humor, action packed rom-com adventure, alternate universe - no familial ties, begrudging partners to tentative friends to lovers, buddy cop trope, trope-tastic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-12
Updated: 2017-03-12
Packaged: 2018-10-04 03:41:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 27,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10267289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PipexVauseman/pseuds/PipexVauseman
Summary: FBI Special Agent Regina Mills is a very skilled and effective investigator in New York City, but is despised by her fellow agents for her arrogance and condescending attitude. In Boston, she is forced to work with Detective Emma Swan, a skilled but foulmouthed and rebellious police officer with the Boston Police Department. (Based on the 2013 movie The Heat)





	1. Meet "Cute"

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted this on my FF account and it's one of my favorites so I'm cleaning up the editing and throwing it over here. Hopefully you enjoy it as well!

Preface: I saw the FF fic by StrykrWolf of the same premise and wanted to try my hand with this AU using one of my favorite movies.

AU: Loosely based on the 2013 movie The Heat (An uptight FBI Special Agent is paired with a foul-mouthed Boston cop to take down a ruthless drug lord.)

Characters:

Regina - Special Agent Sarah Ashburn

Emma - Detective Shannon Mullins

Maleficent - Hale

Graham - Levy

David - Captain Frank Woods

Hook - Julian

Gold - Adam

August - Jason Mullins

Granny - Mrs. Mullins

Ruby, Lily, Kristoff - Misc. Mullins siblings

Neal - Rojas

Belle - Tatiana

Robin - LeSoire

**CHAPTER ONE**

Regina couldn't wait to get in the office. The night before she had received a company-wide email about a promotion opening up in her division and she wanted it. She got in early and made a bee line for her boss's door, knocking once before entering as she heard Maleficent wrapping up a phone call.

Maleficent looked up from her desk at the knock knowing exactly why Regina was in her office but in no way going to make it easy for her.

"What do you want?"

"Just letting you know that I have been observing the agents. Overseeing what they've been up to," her hand moved in a circular motion while she danced vaguely around the subject, "you know....Keeping an eye on them."

"Oh, yeah?" Maleficent asked aloofly. "Supervising?"

"Supervising," Regina laughed. "Exactly. Yes ma'am."

"Look, Mills. I haven't made any decisions yet and honestly I don't know if you're the right person for this position."

"I'm sorry, what? I'm confused. I've closed more cases than any agent here. Should I not have done that?"

Maleficent sighed.

"You are a solid agent, but there are many other solid agents."

Regina scowled.

"None of them closed the Fairy Tale Killer case."

"Regina, it's no secret that none of the other agents like you. I've gotten countless complaints of arrogance and competitiveness, showmanship... Just give it a rest and take a seat as long as I have you here." She picked up a file and handed it to Regina who sank into a chair with a pout. "Chatter was picked up on a guy moving in, goes by the name Rumpelstiltskin. We don't know what he looks like, where he comes from, nothing. We believe this guy," she says, pointing at a picture in the folder, "is doing the legwork for him. Killian Jones, goes by Hook. Nasty son of a bitch. Torture, murder, extortion. This is his M.O.," she thumbs through several pages before stopping at some graphic crime scene photos. "Hangs his victims from hooks then flays them alive for information before chopping them up and scattering the pieces to the winds."

Regina grimaces looking at the pictures and comments dryly, "Hooks. I see where he got the name. Clever."

"Yes, well as you can assume the problem with guys like that is everyone's too scared to talk. Pack your bags. I'm sending you to Boston. You know how to get inside people's heads. You want to find Rumple, get to Hook. If you do well with this, we can talk about the promotion."

.

.

.

Emma was technically on her lunch break but it had been a month since she last made contact with this regular collar and she was in the neighborhood. Driving around the corner she could see him sitting on the stairs leading inside his apartment building and as she pulled to the curb in front of it she rolled down the driver window of her yellow Volkswagen Beetle and yelled out to him.

"Hey, it's Neal! My favorite asshole."

"What are you doing here, Emma? Do you secretly want me back?"

His eyebrows wiggled flirtatiously and Emma scoffed.

"We dated for about a month. In high school. Over a decade ago," Emma snarked with a roll of her eyes.

"Well then, why don't you go down the road," he motioned away from his house with the cigarette in his hand, "and take a little vacation, okay? Go get your groove back, Em. It's time to move on."

He was smiling at her in a dopey way and Emma's lips started to turn up at the ends in a smile as well when she realized it wasn't a cigarette he was holding.

_Got him._

"What is that?" she snapped, pointing at the joint between his fingers.

He hesitated for a moment, realized he was caught, then dropped it and ran.

"That's what I thought!" she yelled at his retreating figure. "I got that motherfucker now."

She slammed her car into reverse and peeled away from his curb, slipping quickly into a higher gear and speeding down the nearby alley, cutting off Neal's escape route and hitting him with the hood and front bumper of her car.

"I got him! I got him!" she yelled to no one in particular, excited to have stunned and hopefully slowed Neal down.

Coming to a quick stop and pulling up the emergency break, Emma pushed the door to her car open and bolted after him. His legs might be longer and he might be stronger but she had stunned him with the tag from her car and she was gaining on him quickly. As he leapt up and tried to pull himself over a chain link fence Emma caught the leg he hadn't swung over yet and yanked him down hard.

"You piece of shit," she screamed at him, still pulling on his leg. "I said stop!"

"Get off me, Emma!"

"Son of a bitch, stop moving!"

"Leave me alone! Get off me!"

"Get down!"

"You're crushing my balls!"

"Good, I hope they fucking rupture!"

He kicked and flailed but she managed to tear him down to the ground before taking a hard, heavy knee to his back. He groaned, the fight worn out of him, no longer flailing around while she pulled his arms behind his back and cuffed him.

"Oh, look at this!" she yelled during the pat down, pulling a bag of marijuana and another, slightly smaller bag of cocaine out of his pocket. "It's not even my birthday, Neal. That's great."

"You planted that shit on me! I'm innocent!"

"Shut up before I kick you for denting my hood."

.

.

.

Regina arrived at the Boston field office intent on getting the necessary documents and leaving as quickly as possible. She roamed the floor looking for her point of contact, Junior Agent Graham Humbert. Noticing his cubicle she knocked on the partition wall and he stood quickly, offering his hand for her to shake.

"Special Agent Regina Mills?"

"Yes. I'm from the New York field office and I need all your files on all known drug dealers of the area."

Straight to business.

Graham smiled, "Right. We heard you were coming."

Handing her a large box full of folders and important documents he offered to show her to her temporary desk.

"That won't be necessary, I'm not staying long."

"Fair enough," Graham chuckled at her over and out tone. "Well, this just came in," he said, adding a new folder to the top of the box. "Low-end dealer just got brought into the East Boston precinct. Name's Neal Cassidy."

.

.

.

Emma had taken Neal into the station and left him in holding before going out to grab a quick cup of coffee and a bear claw as a half-assed attempt at finishing her lunch. Pulling up to the station she saw her usual spot wide open. Pulling ahead of it in order to parallel park by backing into the space she was immediately cut off by a Mercedes that swung wide and pulled in neatly. She bristled at having her spot stolen right out from under her.

"Hey!" She screamed at the brunette walking away from it. "Get back in your car! Hey, asshole! God damn it."

The brunette in question walked authoritatively into the police department past the sign in desk.

"Hey," the dispatcher posted at the desk flagged her down. "You need to sign in."

"FBI," Regina said, disregarding his need for her to sign anything and flashing her credentials. "I'm looking for Captain Nolan."

The dispatcher pointed her towards a man with a wrinkled button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up and a tie loosened around his collar. Regina could tell the captain was a tired and stressed new parent thanks to his disheveled appearance, his hair which had probably been neatly combed and parted to the side at some point early that morning and now stuck out in random places, the dark bags under his eyes, the spit up on his shoulder, and the generous amount of coffee he was currently pouring into a large mug.

Pitying him but having a job to do Regina marched up to him, tapping his shoulder.

"Captain Nolan?"

"Yes," he looked at her puzzled, "how can I help you?"

"Special Agent Regina Mills," she introduced herself, offering her hand to shake. "We got intel recently that you brought in a dealer by the name of Neal Cassidy."

"Yeah," David sighed, "but Detective Swan isn't back from lunch yet."

"I'm sure he won't mind," Regina tried to assure him.

David just shook his head.

"Swan is a _she_ , and we're not allowed to go near her collars."

"Let me tell you what I think," Regina tried to reason with him, "every second we're standing here is interfering with a federal investigation. So, if you would be so kind as to show Mr. Cassidy to an interrogation room..." She let her words hang in the air and motioned for him to lead the way. When he sighed and gave in she smirked in triumph, "Thank you."

.

.

.

Neal sat across from Regina at the table in the interrogation room.

"You are looking at possession with intent, which is a Class-D drug charge, Chapter 94C, Section 32A."

"I had a joint, some weed, and a little bit of coke. Since when is that shit illegal?"

"The answer to your question is always, and with your priors you are looking at 25 years and some pretty stiff fines."

"Who the hell cares about fines? That's 25 years!"

"Right. So, let's see what you make of these," she said, dropping some of the crime scene photos on the table in front of him. "What I make of them is that somebody doesn't want somebody else selling on their turf. But you're still here...and you're alive. Why is that?" She sat back in her chair studying him, "Who are you working for?"

"Nobody," he lied, immediately clamming up.

She raised an eyebrow, unimpressed and unbelieving.

"Who are you working for?"

"Nobody!" he cried out. Realizing she wouldn't drop the question he pointed to the pictures and added, "If I tell you, that's my ass chopped up into a million motherfucking pieces."

Regina allowed her features to soften and a soft sigh to escape her lips.

"I don't want you to do time and I don't want you to get chopped up into tiny, little mother-effing pieces. I can protect you. I can. But you've got to help me."

Neal nodded and leaned forward conspiratorially, "I can help you."

"You'll help me?"

He nodded again, "Yeah."

"Where can I find Killian Jones?"

Neal shrugged, "I get my shit from one of Hook's hookers, a chick named Lacey French, I don't deal with him directly."

Regina pulled out her notepad and pen, "Can you describe her?"

"Brown hair."

"Okay." Looking up and realizing that was the extent of his description she waved her hand in the air impatiently, "Can you maybe be a little bit more specific? _I_ have brown hair."

"French accent. Maybe that's why they call her French...I don't think that's her real name."

"Great," Regina rolled her eyes. "That was very helpful. Thank you."

.

.

.

Emma was beyond pissed. Because that bitch in the Mercedes had stolen her parking spot she'd had to cruise back and forth, up and down the aisles in the parking lot looking for an opening. Finally finding a tight spot between two cruisers Emma parked her car but when she tried to open her door it hit the passenger door of the patrol unit to her left. Shoving the door open and closed had only managed to ding her car and the patrol unit. Screaming in frustration and shaking her steering wheel Emma realized she would have to look for another spot or say _fuck it_ and make the best of this shitty space. Rolling down her window she climbed out and slammed her car door a few more times for good measure.

Storming into the station she slammed the main entrance doors too, opening them with a hard push, and started yelling at the uniformed officers in her path who were doing nothing other than laughing and joking with each other, enjoying their day.

"Oh! Ha-ha! Oh, yeah! We're at a comedy party! Move the fuck out of my way," she brushed past them towards holding. "Get a room. Jesus. And don't think I forgot you owe me $40 you fucker," she pointed at one of the patrol officers, "and tomorrow it's $60. Fucking dickweed." Rounding the corner she noticed a janitor was mopping the empty holding cell. Turning her attention and rage on the short officer assigned to guard prisoners in holding she barked out at him, "Leroy, why the shit is the cage empty? What did I tell you about moving my prisoners?"

"Sorry sister," he said, sounding genuinely sorry. "He's in interrogation."

Emma closed her eyes and took a deep, calming breath feeling her blood boiling.

"And why would he be in interrogation when I'm standing right here?"

"They came and got him."

Emma leaned over his desk menacingly, "'They' who? It better be two of me. Is it two of me?"

"It was a lady," he said with a shrug like that was explanation itself.

"I'm a lady!" She scowled at him when he scoffed before continuing with her rant. "Was it me? Was I the lady? Did I come and get him?"

"No, it was a different lady. She was nice."

"I'm fucking nice!" Emma scowled. "Why was she nice to you?"

"She made me give her the keys."

"I'm gonna make you fucking bend over and I'm gonna reach up your ass into your pocket and get the keys to your house..." she mimed how she would reach up and grab the keys, "then I'm gonna drive there, come in your front fucking door, and kill you in your sleep. I'm gonna stab you to death with your own fucking badge, how does that sound?"

.

.

.

"Okay," Regina said, gathering up the papers from the table and ending the interview. "I think I have a clear idea of what we're looking for, and I appreciate your time."

The interrogation room door was yanked open causing Neal to flinch and Regina to glance up with a quirk of her eyebrow as Emma came barging in.

"Wow, lady," she chuckled mirthlessly. "You're on a real fucking roll."

"Excuse me?"

"No, I won't excuse you. I just spent the last 30 minutes thinking of ways to kill you."

"I'm sorry," Regina pushed her chair back and stood up, "when did we meet?"

Emma ignored her and turned to Neal, "Is this your lawyer?" Her attention shifted back to Regina after a second though. "Are you an insurance salesman? Do you sell those shitty suits?"

Regina chose to ignore the wildly inaccurate fighting words--her business clothes were high end yet practical--in favor of moving forward as an adult.

"I'm Special Agent Regina Mills. How can I help you?"

"You can get all of that," Emma motioned to Regina's entire body in a wide sweeping hand gesture, "and get it the fuck out of here. This is my room."

Regina glanced behind Emma thinking this wild-haired woman in skin tight jeans and a hideous red leather jacket was another suspect waiting to be interrogated.

"Were you about to be questioned by a detective?"

"I am a detective," Emma scoffed, pushing her jacket back to reveal the badge worn on her hip before pointing at Neal, "and that's my perp."

"Ah," Regina nodded her head in understanding. "Well, Detective, Mr. Cassidy will be continuing on with me--"

"No," Emma interrupted immediately, crossing her arms.

"--it's a jurisdictional issue--"

"Not gonna happen."

"--your efforts are duly noted--"

"Oh, great."

"--so could you just," Regina waved her hand dismissively, "close the door on your way out, dear?"

Emma's jaw clenched and she glared at Regina defiantly.

"I'll shut the door _on_ you," she snarked back. "Will you lay down there and put your head in the door?" She pointed to the doorway, "I'll slam it about...157,000 times."

"Trust me, agent," Neal said, not wanting to be around and/or caught in the crossfire of Emma's rage anymore for one day, "you better go."

"Shut your mouth!" Emma snapped. Turning back to Regina she pointed over her shoulder with her thumb, "Get up and we'll settle this outside."

Regina almost laughed.

"I won't be going outside."

"You're gonna get up," Emma started walking backwards herself, heading out the open door, "and come outside."

This time Regina did chuckle.

"No, dear. I don't think I am."

"Fine," Emma closed the door instead, "we'll just do this inside then."

Regina looked over Neal's shoulder, not really sure if anyone was watching on the other side of the glass in the observation room, but raising her voice anyway, "Can somebody remove this person from the interrogation room, please?" Looking back to Emma then with a condescending glance she added, "Mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of. It runs in many families."

Emma slipped her jacket off and dropped it to the floor.

"I'm gonna hit you."

Regina rolled her eyes, "You're not."

"I am," she started walking closer. "I'm gonna hit you, and knock all your little buttons off," she said with a poke to Regina's chest.

Regina snapped then and pushed her back causing Emma to launch herself at the brunette. The fight could barely even be called that and was broken up before escalating to anything too serious by Captain Nolan bursting through the door and separating them.

"Enough! Both of you," he pointed between them, his voice booming, "my office! Now!"

.

.

.

Emma sifted through some papers on his desk, knocked a couple books off his bookcase, shook his coat on the coat rack.

"Nope. Not in there."

Regina had sat back and silently observed Emma wander around her captain's office rummaging through his belongings searching for something and coming up empty handed for a few minutes before curiosity got the better of her.

"What is she looking for?"

David sighed, "My balls."

Emma continued batting around his things.

"It was bad enough you married that softy defense attorney Mary Margaret, but did you really need to knock her up too? This never would have happened a couple years ago."

David took a wet paper towel to the spit up stain on his shoulder.

"The FBI has jurisdiction, Swan. There's nothing I can do."

She picked up his travel mug and shook it, "Maybe they're in here." Putting her ear close to listen she shook again, "Nope. Not there." She opened the door to the bull pen then addressing the officers milling around, "Hey, if anyone sees the Captain's balls, let me know. They're about this big," she yelled, holding up her thumb and index finger pressed together in a non-existent gap, "but a lot tinier. Like a pea, or like a ball bearing. Or if you've ever seen a mouse ball...about half that size. Incredibly tiny," she added before she slammed the door shut.

"Knock it off, Emma."

She huffed and slumped into the chair next to Regina, her feet sprawling out and kicking Regina's bag that had been propped up on the leg of her chair.

"Well that's professional," Regina sighed.

Emma held her hand up to her chest and gasped.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Was that not professional? Here, let me be professional." She picked the bag up and shook it upside down, spilling all the contents on the floor. "Is that better?"

Regina rolled her eyes, "Very mature."

"Wait, hold on." Emma stooped down then, knocking around Regina's things this time. "Let me just straighten this shit up. Oh, hey!" She stood up then, holding a small plastic container with a few Tic-Tacs rolling around in it. "Good news, guys!" She walked back to the door and yanked it open, yelling out at the pen again, "Good news, I found his balls!" She shook the container making the mints knock around loudly and slammed the door shut again. "Perfect. In a clear sack," she threw them at his head, the container bouncing off it. "Enjoy that. Shove those back up there for Mary Margaret. Cop of the year!"

"Keep it up!" he yelled and she flipped him off before storming out of the office altogether.

He sat back in his chair and sighed.

"So, anyway, sir..." Regina tried to just push through the awkwardness. "If you could just, you know, keep her away from me," she bent down and started to put her things back in her bag, "that would be...very helpful." She froze with a frown noticing something very important was missing.

"She stole your keys, didn't she?"

"Yes, she did." Regina could feel her own murderous rage working its way to the surface now. "Do you know where I can find her?"

"She's probably at Lucas's. It's a hotel down the street, little diner and dive bar out back."

.

.

.

Emma quickly knocked back her first beer, knowing the special agent would find her soon, and waved to Ruby for a second glass. By the time Ruby replaced her glass with the new drink Regina came bursting in the door, removing her sunglasses and squinting in the dim light looking for Emma.

The blonde swiveled on her chair and smiled at Regina with a shit-eating grin thanks to the improved mood she felt thanks to a combination of the beer she'd already downed and how tickled it made her to rile up the special agent, choosing to ignore the way the other woman's face looked so god damned attractive when she was angry.

Spinning Regina's keys around her index finger she called out to her, "Drop something?"

After ripping them out of her hand, Regina started lecturing her.

"You are so concerned about taking down a guy like Cassidy, wasting all this time when I could have stopped a drug lord who is far more dangerous and supplies to people like Cassidy."

The smile fell off her face, "Bullshit. Who?"

"You want to see some bull feces?" Regina asked, rummaging around in the bag that had been organized prior to Emma's previous act of immaturity.

"I think I said 'bullshit'."

Regina pulled out the same crime scene photos she had shown Neal and handed them to Emma who frowned at some notes in the margins.

"Why do I not know who Rumpelstiltskin is?"

"That would probably be because the FBI knows more than you do."

Regina thought that was a perfectly reasonable explanation but Emma looked beyond offended.

"Anything happening in _my_ neighborhood, I have a right to know."

"No," Regina shook her head condescendingly, "you actually don't. You _want_ to know, dear. But, you do not have the clearance that would allow you to read everything that is in this file," she said with a tap to the folder sticking out of her bag.

Emma softened, handing Regina back the photos and watching her tuck them back into the folder before setting it on the surface of the bar.

"Yeah," she nodded glumly. "You're right. It's just that, when bad things happen in my neighborhood... I get a little passionate about it. I grew up here, ya know? I was a foster kid so I got bounced around from home to home until Ruby," she nodded to the woman at the other end of the bar who was pouring another patron a beer, "her grandmother took me and a couple other kids in. Gave us some place to go. But, you're right. I shouldn't have read your files. I went too far. I'm sorry."

Regina eyed her skeptically.

That seemed suspiciously easy.

"Well, I accept your apology." She wasn't convinced but she had bigger fish to fry and needed to get out of this dump and away from this idiot detective so she wasn't willing to push it. "You need to understand that this is a highly important case and the information is highly, highly sensitive. That's why we have these clearances."

Emma took a sip of her beer, nodding along.

"Right. I don't have the clearances," she said with a _what can you do_ shrug. "I mean you're a...You are, wow, FBI. You are a goddamn angel of the law."

Regina shook her head, "Well, that's a little--"

"I want you to spread those wings and just soar!"

Ruby finally noticed the odd conversation and the stranger Emma was talking to and tapped the bar in front of Regina.

"Can I get you anything, hon?"

As Ruby inadvertently distracted the other brunette, Emma siezed the opportunity and swiped the folder that had been left on the bar, stuffing it into the waist band of her jeans, hidden under her leather coat behind her back.

Turning back to Emma, Regina took her relaxed beer sipping as a good sign.

"So, are we good?"

Emma smiled at her charmingly, "Absolutely."

"Okay," Regina stepped off the bar stool and brushed off her slacks, not thinking to be suspicious of Emma anymore, her bright smile and pretty green eyes she hadn't noticed before now blinding her and those adorable dimples distracting her. "Well," she gulped nervously, "thank you."

"Thank _you_ ," Emma offered back with a wink. "America thanks you."

"And I it," Regina replied back awkwardly, starting to walk backwards out of the bar.

"And it you. Good work out there."

"Thank you," Regina said again, stumbling over a bar stool.

"Whoa," Emma chuckled and this time it came with a genuine laugh and smile. "Careful there, special agent."

Regina waved nervously at the blonde before exiting the bar, so embarassed at herself she hit her own forehead with the palm of her hand, muttering "idiot."

Emma rolled her eyes watching the door close behind the brunette, a little smirk still on her face as she swiveled on the barstool, lifting her butt an inch off the seat and reaching behind her jacket to pull the folder out and look through those _highly sensitive_ files.

.

.

.

After looking through the paperwork Emma immediately drove out to the prison to visit her oldest sibling from the foster home, August Booth. Granny had raised all of them: her granddaughter Ruby and the fostered August, Emma, Lily, and Kristoff. As the oldest, August spent the most time in the system before Granny took him in, so he was arguably the most screwed up. Being the most screwed up also meant he was the one in trouble the most, which one day led to Emma being forced to arrest him in a narcotics bust which he was now nearing the end of his time for.

They sat across from each other at a table in visitation for a few silent, awkward moments before Emma spoke up.

"So," she drawled out. "How you been, Auggie?"

"Cut the shit, Em," he laughed.

"You want to talk about Rumplestiltskin?"

"Nope. Never heard of him."

"Don't lie to me," she demanded in a firm whisper. "You're my brother, I know when you're lying."

He shrugged, trying to convince her.

"I'm just a low-level guy. I've heard of him, but never met the guy."

Slapping her open palm down on the surface of the table in front of him, Emma made August jump.

"He's a goddamn animal and I'm trying to keep him from meeting you," she said, her eyes boring into him with a silent plea for the truth.

He chuckled, "You gonna storm through Boston and take down a drug lord?"

Emma shrugged, "Yeah, I might. Have you met me?"

"Yeah, unfortunately," he said with a laugh. He studied her for a moment, smiling at her affectionately. "I get out tomorrow, you know. I'm coming home. I'm gonna be fine." Taking her hand in his as comfortably as he could with the shackles still in place he tried to reassure her, "I promise, all right?"

.

.

.

As Regina neared the apartment building listed as Lacey French's address she was not surprised to see Emma's yellow Volkswagen already parked out front. Getting out of her Mercedes she approached Emma's window and knocked on the glass which was already partially rolled down. Emma startled at the sound, aiming her gun at whoever dared to disturb her from cleaning it--namely, Regina.

"Never approach me if I'm not expecting you!" she yelled at the brunette who had jumped out of the line of fire.

Standing back to her full height and brushing imaginary debris off her slacks in a show of nerves Regina snarked back at Emma, "What are you, an animal?" Sighing, she noticed the file on Emma's passenger seat and pointed at it, "You said you would stay off my case and now I find you outside of Miss French's apartment."

"I live here."

"Oh, that's hilarious. You know what's not funny? That you stole a confidential FBI case file."

Emma shrugged, "I don't remember any of that."

"I'm going to say it one more time," Regina pointed at her, "stand down, officer."

Emma pointed right back at her, "Fuck off, officer."

"Okay, now you've really done it," Regina reached in her coat pocket, removing her cell phone. "I'm going to call my boss."

Walking several feet from Emma's car Regina could still hear her yelling back, "Yeah, you do that, tattle tits! Fucking narc!"

After a handful of rings Maleficent finally picked up.

"Mal, I need authorization to suspend a police officer from my investigation."

Looking back Regina saw Emma flipping her off.

"Regina, why is working with local authorities such a problem for you?"

"Ma'am, it's not. I understand how this might sound coming from me, but I think this individual might actually be mentally unstable."

"Her captain says she grew up on those streets and knows them better than anyone. That seems like an asset to our investigation."

"Ma'am, I--"

"I don't want to hear it, Mills. Just work with her. Show me you can do this or forget the promotion."

With that, Maleficent ended the call and Regina was left with dead air. Knowing she had no other choice Regina wandered closer, holding the phone to her ear and pretending Maleficent was still on the line.

"Well, ma'am, no need to take someone's badge. I think I can--yes, I think I can work something out, ma'am. Okay. Thank you. Yes. Okay, goodbye." Pulling the phone away quickly so Emma wouldn't see the screen had long since been blacked out she turned to her, trying to free her tone of hostility. "I think you and I got off on the wrong foot."

"Oh!" Emma gasped in faux surprise.

"I don't know Boston and you obviously have a lot of resources and a lot of knowledge about the area that could be...useful."

Emma nodded in mock agreement, "Probably very."

"So...maybe we can work together on this."

Emma scoffed, "I don't need your help to take down Rumpelstiltskin."

"You wouldn't have even known about him if not for me, so obviously the FBI can get information you can't. And there's a lot more where that came from," she said, pointing to the file still on Emma's passenger seat.

"Maybe I just need to hear a little, _I need your help, Emma_ ," the blonde teased with a smug look on her face.

Regina shook her head, "I won't be doing that."

"Okay," Emma said, starting to roll her car window up. "Then get your ass back in your car."

"This is ridiculous," Regina huffed. "I'm an FBI agent."

Emma held her hand to her mouth, miming yelling while saying, " _I need your help, Emma_ ," in a goofy voice.

Regina rolled her eyes and mumbled, "I need your help, Emma."

Now Emma rolled her eyes.

"What is this, a whisper party? I want that third floor to hear it. _I need your help, Emma_. Then give me a little echo on the 'Emma.' Come on. _I need your help, Emma-Emma-Emma_."

Squaring her shoulders, straightening her spine, and swallowing her pride Regina did as requested and Emma immediately jumped out of her car.

"Move," she ordered her as she pushed past her, headed for the apartment building. "Move! God, even doing what I ask you're annoying." When they reached the complex's doors she turned back to Regina, "I will work with you as long as we're clear that this is my case."

Regina frowned, "That's actually wildly incorrect."

Emma just flashed her that disarming, charming grin she had flashed at her in the bar.

"Awesome. Glad you see it my way."

.

.

.

Following Emma inside the building and up the stairs to the seventh floor they were soon standing in front of Lacey French's apartment. As Emma's hand rose to knock on the door Regina reached out and touched her wrist, stilling the fist before it could make contact.

"Let me take the lead on this. I'm a trained interviewer."

"Interviewer? What are you, Barbara Walters? I thought we'd go in there and bring in some heat on her."

"I'm sorry," Regina looked genuinely confused. "What does that even mean?"

"Me and you," Emma pointed back and forth between them. "We're the heat. We go in there, interrogate her, scare the shit out of her."

Regina cocked her head to the side and smiled condescendingly, "We don't say 'interrogation', it's too aggressive. Rule number one, catch more with sugar than with a stick."

Emma frowned, "That's a horrible fucking saying."

Regina went on explaining, unphased by Emma's negativity.

"We like to create a genuine personal interest in the subject, allowing them to open up. Then I'll perform instant personality assessments based on the Myers-Briggs theory..." she was rambling now despite Emma's dramatic drop of her head and mimed snoring, "Thematic Apperception Tests and a few others I won't bore you with."

Emma's head perked back up then, a sarcastic look on her face.

"I gotta tell you, I am balls deep in boredom right now." Sighing and nodding in defeat she relents though, "Okay, as long as you don't do that whole long explanation thing again we'll try it your way first." When she sees Regina smirking at her win she mutters under her breath, "only because you're older," earning herself a glare.

Regina knocks on the door and just to be a brat Emma raises her hand and starts knocking as well. Soon her and Regina are pushing each others hands back and forth, a steady stream of knocks never ceasing since the first one started the obnoxious sign they were at the door.

"Oh my god," a voice with a French accent behind the door is heard, then the locks being slid back allowing the female occupant to pull it open and reveal who on earth is making all that noise. "What do you want?"

Regina pushes herself a little bit more in front of Emma before addressing the woman in front of them.

"Miss French, I am Special Agent Regina Mills and this is Detective Swan," she jerks her thumb over her shoulder, pointing at Emma who simply nods her head in greeting, "and we would like to ask you a few questions if you could give us a moment."

"Oh, shoot. You know, now is bad." The french woman pouts out her lower lip pretending to be sorry and laying on a thicker accent. "I'm making butter. How about other time?" she offers with the broken accent before trying to close the door in their faces.

"How about right fucking now?" Emma asks as she suddenly pushes past Regina and knocks the door open, barreling inside. "Right fucking now sounds good."

Lacey throws her hands up in the air in frustration but takes a seat on the couch, Regina and Emma sitting on chairs across from her. Regina quickly thanks their host for allowing them inside while Emma shoots her a quick frown because she's the real reason they're in there.

"So," Regina takes the notepad and pen from her coat pocket, starting the interview. "How long have you lived here?"

Lacey picks a cigarette up and lights it, humming in a non-commital way, "I've lived here..." she takes a deep inhale on the cigarette, "since I moved in."

Regina nods and writes on her notepad while Emma sighs and bends over, squeezing her knees and rocking lightly on the chair in frustration, biting her tongue to keep herself from saying anything.

"Okay," Regina drawls out, trying to coax additional information out, "that's...very helpful. Why don't we get a little more specific? What do you do for a living?"

Lacey takes another deep drag and Emma knows she's not going to willingly say shit.

"I know what this asshole does for a living," she says, challenging her to fight back.

Belle frowns, "What do you know, asshole?"

"Sugar, no stick," Regina mutters quietly on her right and Emma sits back in her seat, quietly fuming. "Miss French, would I be correct in assuming you speak French?" Belle nods at her like she's a moron and Regina caps her pen. "Voulez-vous aller en prison?"

"I don't understand what you say."

"Nice bullshit French," Emma snarks.

"That was perfect French."

"I mean, I don't understand," Belle clarifies. "What you are talking about? Why do I go to jail when I don't do shit?!"

"Ah!" Regina gloats. "So she did understand what I was saying, just not the context."

"Oh, sweet god," Emma grumbles as she stands up. She passes Regina and mutters, "Okay, Rosetta Stone. You're done." Plopping down on the pleather couch next to Belle, Emma squirms tyring to make herself comfortable. "How many porns have been made on this thing?"

Lacey simply exhales another lung-full of smoke, "Oh, this couch not of your satisfaction? You're not comfy?"

Emma glares at her, "Let's just get real here. We both know you've been blowing shit up your nose all day. Man," she takes a deep, calming breath, "I get it. There's nothing more I'd love to do than slip out of these skinny jeans and boots, put my feet up, have a little smack. Real good time. Maybe knock back a couple cold ones, a bowl of Cocoa Pebbles, watch some cartoons. I'd get a bowl of coke," she mimes holding a bowl and shaking her head in it, "put my face right in there, cut it with a little Ritalin. Heaven on fucking earth, right?"

"Sure," Lacey nods.

"I'd camp out all week for tickets to that show," Emma laughs.

Regina can't believe what she's hearing.

"What is this, Training Day?"

"All fucking week I'd camp out for that! But you," she points her finger at Lacey, "you piece of shit, you've been rolling deep for a long time, and now it's time you open up that goddamn mouth and tell us what we want to know."

"You got good point," Lacey shakes her head like she's seriously considering what Emma said. "I tell you what, I open my mouth. You get the fuck out of my house now! How's that for open mouth? You get the fuck out!"

"Yeah, yeah. I'll get the fuck out." Emma grumbles and puts her hand on the coffee table to help herself stand up, pushing the ash tray on the coffee table towards Regina in the process. "You should really stop smoking though because it's an awfully bad habit. You're leaving half your lipstick in the ashtray," Emma says in an off-handed way that makes Regina notice that all the cigarette butts have red around the rim except one. "I had a great aunt that lost most of her teeth to smoking," Emma rambles, wandering around the apartment to draw Lacey's attention away from Regina and the ash tray. "A lot of fistfights too, but mostly smoking. Well, we're gonna get out of your hair."

Reaching a closed door Emma acts like she's going to turn the handle.

"That is not front door!" Lacey yells at her as Emma lifts her leg and kicks the door in, revealing an old man sitting on the toilet in the bathroom.

"Put your hands where I can see them! Don't fucking move! Is this your drug mule?"

"Oh my god!" Lacey screams, "That is my father!"

Emma points her gun towards the toilet bowl, "Do you have balloons of horse up your ass? Are you trying to shit them out now?"

Lacey is livid and Regina has managed to bag the lone cigarette butt with an evidence bag and pocket it.

"You broke my fucking door!"

Standing up and moving between Lacey and Emma, Regina places her hand on Emma's forearm instructing her to stand down.

"Who closes the door to take a shit?"

"Get out, bull in china shop! Get out of my house!"

"Wow," Regina chuckles as the door is slammed behind them. "You are just all stick and no sugar."

Emma frowns at her, "Did you get the cigarette or not?"

"Uh, yeah..." Regina's suddenly struck by how well Emma executed that diversion. Shaking her head she adds, "Of course I did."

Emma heads back down the stairs leaving Regina to follow her.

"I snagged these matches too," Emma calls out, waving them over her shoulder to Regina who immediately bags them as well. "I think our guy likes to go to The Gold Club."

"Let's find out, shall we?" Regina asks, eager to get out of the run down building.

"Hang on," Emma stops suddenly on the second floor, walking two doors down from the stairwell. "That couch was disgusting. I need to wash my hands."

Pulling her keys from her pocket she unlocks the door in front of them.

"Wait a minute," Regina is confused but follows Emma inside. "You actually live here?"

"That's what I said," Emma huffs, standing in front of the sink and scrubbing up to her elbows like a surgeon prepping for surgery.

"Wow," Regina says taking in her surroundings. "Your windows are all boarded up."

"Yeah," Emma shrugs, "I've got the glass, I just don't have the, you know...window blankets."

"The curtains?" Regina offers with a condescending tone and a roll of her eyes.

"Yeah, curtains. Whatever." She notices Regina looking at the picture from many Christmasses ago of her, Granny, Ruby, August, Lily, and Kristoff. "That's just my family," she mumbles.

Regina jumps, embarassed she was caught snooping.

"It's sweet."

Emma looks around nervously, eager for a subject change.

"You hungry? Want something to eat? I didn't finish my sub sandwich the other day," she offers, mostly kidding.

"No, thank you," Regina declines and looks sick at just the thought.

Emma crosses her arms defensively, "Sorry I don't have poached eggs in rubies for you."

"No," Regina backtracks, "I don't mean to be rude, but...one could catch a MRSA infeciton in here, that's all."

Emma's eyes narrow defensively, "Which part of that wasn't rude?"

"For example, that," she points to the front door, "has no extra lock installed. You have no additional methods of security in your own home and as a police officer you should know better. Someone could barge in at any moment, it's not safe."

"No one's coming in here because they know I keep this fully stocked."

Pulling open the fridge reveals a complete arsenal.

"Oh my god."

"Yeah, I know."

"You keep all this in your house?"

Regina reaches a hand out to touch a grenade she sees rolling around loose in the freezer door when Emma barks at her, "Don't touch that! It occassionally ticks. I got it on eBay. It was supposed to be bigger and...different. It doesn't matter. I'm gonna 'Bad Feedback' his ass, though."

.

.

.


	2. The Cliche Makeover

Regina brought Emma to the FBI Boston field office to gather more intel and regroup. Regina was keeping herself busy while they waited, outlining the network of suspects on a bulletin board, all names and corresponding pictures in place, other than the one at the top of the pyramid: Rumpelstiltskin.

"All right, ladies," Junior Agent Humbert announced. "Here's the DNA results from the book of matches and the cigarette butt you got from French's. We pulled two sets of prints, first one's a real nut job. Look at this," he pointed to the list of offenses while the mugshot was loading, "reckless driving, assault, arson--"

The mugshot finished loading.

It was a picture of Emma.

"Oh my god," Regina scowled at her. "Really?"

Emma ignored her and pointed at Graham.

"Who the fuck is this guy?"

"He's my assistant," Regina said dismissively.

Graham whistled and pointed to the badge around his neck, "You know I'm an agent, right?"

"Arson, Detective Swan?"

"It was a drug house!"

"I really feel the need to finish reading your files."

"I feel the need for you to stay out of my business so I don't punch you in the teeth."

Regina rolled her eyes before turning her attention back to Graham.

"What did you find out about the cigarette?"

He opened a new window on the computer screen, "Robin Locksley. Local businessman. Got tons of ties to the drug world, black market, as well as prostitution rings. Co-Owner of The Gold Club."

"Guess we found our distributor."

Graham clicked through several pictures of Locksley from past stakeouts and Regina noticed he was on his cell phone in the majority of the candid shots.

"Looks like a real Chatty Cathy. Did you tap the phone?"

"I haven't been able to. The guy gets a new prepaid every other week. By the time I can get his phone number and hack in, he's got a new one."

Regina nodded, assuming as much.

"Let's just get a bug into the phone he does have. I want to know what he's saying this week," she ordered Graham. "Call and get a court order and a bug. We'll do it ourselves."

He smiled up at her, "If you're gonna boss me around, at least buy me dinner first."

"No," she replied automatically before exiting the room.

"Okay. Cool." He sat up straight in his chair, shuffling around awkwardly, "I'll get that to you ASAP."

"You've got to work on your game," Emma told him, a frown on her face. "That was weak."

"What?" he shrugged. "I thought I was being charming."

"I don't know what to say to that. _I_ am charming," she shook her head at him, "that wasn't it. Now I just feel bad for you."

.

.

.

They left the field office and started walking down the street, trying to formulate a plan.

"Okay, so Locksley co-owns The Gold Club. Let's start surveilling it and figure out how to get a bug in his phone. Tell me everything you know about it."

Emma shrugged, "It's just a shitty club downtown. I've never been inside, but there's always a line of awful people around the corner. They've called P.D. a couple times to break up fights." Emma stopped walking causing Regina to almost run into her.

"Detective Swan--" Regina started to lecture her.

"Oh shit," Emma muttered, ignoring Regina and focusing on the van approaching them slowly.

'More Than a Feeling' echoed loudly through the soundsystem and the driver honked, then flipped Emma off and sped back up, merging into traffic and driving away.

Shocked, all Regina could think to do was ask, "Who was that?"

"Granny," Emma answered simply and left it at that.

.

.

.

They sat parked in Regina's Mercedes outside The Gold Club on their stakeout in complete silence. Regina turned the radio on and Emma sighed at the classical music, immediately pushing the CD button and groaned at the book on tape that was far worse before fiddling with the controls and finding a live broadcast of the Red Sox game. Now Regina was the one to sigh and she turned the radio back off.

"Why don't we talk instead?" She asked, wanting to disolve the awkward silence floating between them. Feeling the glare Emma was sending her way she continued, "How about I tell you a little something about myself?"

"Oh god," Emma sat back heavily in her seat in a show of dramatic protest.

"Let's see...I went to undergrad at Yale. I have been with the Bureau for about twelve years. Up for a promotion," she smiled proudly. "I caught the Fairy Tale Killer---"

Emma hummed at that.

"I remember thinking that guy was innocent."

"He's been in jail for eleven months," Regina scoffed. "That would make me...a _horrible_ person if what you said was actually factual."

Emma shrugged like it was no big deal, "Well you can just tell the judge you fucked up."

"I didn't! I did _not_ 'eff up'," she said, punctuating the censored swear words with air quotes.

"Don't get your panties in a wad."

"They're not wadded."

"I'm intuitive. I say what I feel. I'm usually right. Take it or leave it."

Regina scowled at Emma for a moment before noticing headlights approaching quickly. A large black Hummer sped up to the entrance of the club and dropped a man off at the velvet ropes where a bouncer was letting a few people in at a time.

"There's our guy," Regina said with a tap to her glass, pointing the man out as he stood outside talking on his cell phone.

"What's the plan?"

"Get close and plant the bug."

She opened her door and started to get out of her car, ready to walk right into the club after him. Emma's hand shot out and grabbed her at the elbow, stopping her by pulling her back into her seat.

"Where the fuck do you think you're going?"

"Inside," Regina told her, the 'duh' implied heavily in her tone. "I will pull the fire alarm. The crowd will head towards the exits. I will bump into him. I will grab the cell, place the bug in it, tell him he dropped the phone. It's something I like to call a 'cop drop'," she explained with a smug smile on her face that made Emma's eyes roll.

"We can't--" Emma stopped herself. "No. _You_ can't go in there like that."

Regina looked down at her crisp, clean pantsuit and frowned.

"Like what?"

"You are going to kill us out there," Emma whined. "You don't fit in! You look like you're gonna set up a table and do their taxes. You think you'll bump into him and he won't think something's up?"

"Fine," Regina pouted. "So we go back to my place and I'll change."

Emma shook her head, "We can't use anything of yours."

"Why not?"

"My fear is I could put you in a bikini and you'll still look like a fucking bank teller."

Regina rolled her eyes, "Do you have to use that language?"

"I'm trying to make a point!" Sighing, she looked more closely at what she was going to have to deal with. "Your face," Emma said, pointing to said face, "and whatever is underneath this shitty outfit," she gave the rest of Regina's body a sweeping wave of her hand, "is _maybe_ not terrible."

Regina brushed imaginary lint off the legs of her slacks.

"I'll have you know I dress appropriately," she said, giving Emma's wardrobe choices a pointed glare, "unlike _some_ people."

"I got it!" Emma's fingers snapped, "I got it. It's when this," she pointed at Regina's mouth, "your big, flapping mouth starts running, and then you put," she waved to Regina's clothes again, "this getup on top of it, and it's just," she looked at her with pity, "It's just a boner killer. I'm gonna get you some help though."

.

.

.

Emma directed Regina back to Lucas's. Ruby worked the bar and managed the hotel so she stayed on property and Emma needed access to her wardrobe and makeup skills.

Emma knocked on the door and when Ruby opened it, she pushed Regina in.

"I need you to whore her up real good, Rubes."

Regina scowled and gave Emma a backhanded slap to the upper arm, making her wince.

"What about you? I have to change and you get to look like that?" she asked, gesturing to Emma's usual boots, skinny jeans, tank top, leather jacket combo.

"I know," she smiled smugly, "it's not fair."

Ruby was quick to burst her bubble.

"She's right, Em. If you want to get in there you need to change too. Brush your hair out so I can curl it while I get her started." She fluffed Regina's hair, "I'm gonna just finger tease the shit out of this."

Regina took a step back, "Wait. What?"

"I won't need to hide a rat's nest of tangles like I do with Emma so I'm just going to finger tease you."

"What? What is that? What does that mean?"

Emma chuckled, quietly teasing, "Not what you want it to mean."

Regina scowled at Emma again before Ruby pushed her towards the bathroom with a change of clothes.

.

.

.

Ruby quickly but efficiently styled and changed Emma and Regina, all the while keeping them apart to minimize bickering. Regina was checking her new makeup in the vanity when Emma emerged from the bathroom.

"Isn't this mine from that undercover job I did a couple months ago?" she asked her sister, distracted by tugging down an impossibly short, black leather dress.

"Yeah, but I look hotter in it," Ruby snarked, sticking her tongue out.

Regina seriously doubted that, so engrossed in checking Emma out that she didn't realize Emma was doing the same, now noticing the figure hugging red dress Ruby had put Regina in.

"Ahem," Ruby cleared her throat and they both jumped. "I think my work here is done."

.

.

.

Regina smirked in triumph when they cut the line at the entrance and the bouncer immediately let them in. Looking around the club they tried to gain their bearings. Across from the bar was a DJ booth and a dance floor and to the left of that was a VIP area. Emma tapped Regina and motioned to the dance floor where Locksley was dancing with several random women.

Regina leaned in close so Emma could hear over the music, tickling her ear in the process.

"I'm going in. Cover me."

Emma shook her head immediately and pulled Regina close, unintentionally enjoying their proximity in the process.

"Why are you leaving me behind?"

Regina smirked and mouthed _jealous_ which made Emma flip her off.

"Can you dance?"

"Special Agent Mills," Emma's dimples made an appearance with her cheeky smile, "are you asking me to dance?"

"Idiot," Regina laughed. "If we want his phone we need to get close, and to get close we need to--" she motioned back at him and the girls who were now basically grinding on him.

Emma grimaced at the sight.

"No," she admitted with a sigh. "I can't dance."

"That's what I assumed. So," Regina waved her away, "go blend in at the bar and cover me."

Emma slunk away grumpily while Regina made her way through the crowd. Given their interactions so far and the brunette's personality, Emma was pleasantly surprised watching the woman as she approached their target. She looked relaxed and fun and--really fucking hot--but Emma was willing to write that particular part off to Ruby's assistance and not some actual attraction.

She watched as Regina got close and started to wedge out the other girls. She couldn't see what was being said but whatever it was must be working because Locksley's attention was immediately diverted to her. He pulled her closer by her hips and Emma scoffed.

Fuck this. She was _not_ jealous.

Regina leaned in, standing up on her tippy-toes, one hand across his chest, the other behind his neck to bring him close to talk in his ear like she had just been doing to Emma.

Emma whipped around and tapped the bar top, "Give me a whiskey."

She glanced back over her shoulder and watched Locksley lead Regina toward the VIP lounge area, his hand on the small of her back.

The bartender placed the drink in front of her, "Fourteen dollars."

"Fourteen dollars?!" The bartender nodded yes with a bored look and she took her growing frustration out on him. "Really? Fourteen dollars? Is it magic fucking whiskey? Do I get a motorcycle with it? Is it served in Jesus's shoe?"

She huffed and slapped down some cash. Glancing back she noticed Regina sitting next to Locksley on a couch. She was leaned in close, touching his arm and laughing at what he was saying, the phone lying forgotten on the arm rest to his right. Looking up, her eye's connected with Emma's who immediately started miming for Regina to reach over him and take the phone.

"Can I sit in your lap?" Regina asked him suddenly, interrupting his train of thought but making him smile.

"Obviously," he grinned, sitting back in his seat to make more room for her. "I like where this is going."

Regina straddled his lap, her hands resting lightly on his shoulders. He dragged his hands from her hips, up her back, pulling her closer while he leaned in, trying to kiss her and that's when Emma decided she had officially had enough with this stupid sugar over a stick method.

Slamming the shot she started to stumble towards the VIP area, pushing her way inside and knocking the drinks from the table in front of them. Locksley and Regina sprung apart at the loud crash and he jumped out of the way to avoid getting any liquid on his shoes. Regina took advantage of the distraction Emma was once again creating and grabbed the phone, slipping the bug in the battery port.

"Get her out of here!" he yelled at one of his security guards.

"Get your merry little men off me," Emma slurred.

"Remove her!"

"I'm so sorry!" Regina rushed over, holding up a doubled over Emma by slinging her arm under her armpit. "She holds her liquor like a five-year-old."

"Take her home," the security guard barked and started ushering them out of the club.

"I didn't get your number!" Locksley yelled out to Regina over the sound of the music, waving his phone frantically in the air.

"I'll find you," Regina yelled back and Emma rolled her eyes.

Once they got outside she stood back to her full height and disentangled herself from Regina, leading them back to the car.

"That went well," Regina said, smiling victoriously.

Emma huffed, "What kind of stupid name is Robin anyway?"

"I believe it's unisex."

"Ha," Emma let out a small, humorless chuckle. "Maybe _you_ need sex. I had sex a couple days ago."

Regina rolled her eyes.

"No, idiot. U-N-I-sex."

Emma realized her mistake, having misheard Regina, but found herself flirting anyway.

"Oh," she smirked. "You and I sex. Well I'm not gonna say no to that."

"Detective Swan--" Regina started to lecture her with a laugh but sobered, her eyes locked to the rear view mirror.

"What is it?"

"I think we've got a tail. Hold on, I can lose them."

Taking a sharp corner abruptly, Regina increased her speed.

"Want me to take the wheel?"

"No, I was a precision driver at Quantico. They thought I was the instructor, I was that good."

Emma took her gun out of the glove box, glancing over her shoulder at the headlights still following them.

"Damn," Regina huffed when another sharp turn refused to throw off their company.

"Lose them!"

"What do you think I'm trying to do?"

She sped down a side street, cutting off a passing vehicle, and when their tail tried to copy her maneuver it was wedged into a gridlock in a four-way stop.

"Aha!" She smugly smiled over at Emma, "And _that_ is how you lose a tail."

"Nicely done. I'm surprised." As she started to lower her gun the familiar headlights came back into focus and Regina groaned. "Our friends are back," she snarked. "I got it. Tag out."

Regina tried to stop Emma as she started to lean towards the driver's side of the car.

"What are you doing?"

"I'll show you how to lose a tail."

Without warning she pushed her foot past Regina's, stomping on the break and skidding the Mercedes to a stop, the vehicle behind them immediately rear-ending Regina's car. Passenger and driver doors opened on both vehicles and all four occupants immediately jumped out, guns drawn.

"FBI! Drop your weapon!" Regina shouted.

Two men faced them and the taller of the two yelled back, "Special Agent Victor Whale, DEA! Drop it!"

"Why are you following us?" Emma challenged.

"Are you fucking deaf? DEA! Drop your fucking gun now!"

Emma and Regina glanced at each other briefly before raising their hands in surrender. After confirming their identities the two men introduced themselves.

"Special Agent Victor Whale," the taller man repeated, pointing at himself. Pointing to the shorter, older man on his right he added, "Special Agent Adam Beastly." He holstered his weapon, groaning in frustration. "Two fucking months we've been sitting on that club, then you two come in one night like a couple of amateurs and almost blow the whole thing!"

Regina crossed her arms in defense.

"Obviously you have no idea who you are speaking with. I'm Federal Agent Regina Mills."

"Yeah," Whale rolled his eyes, "I'm sure your credentials are quite impressive, as is your choice of wardrobe. Nice dress by the way, I think I saw the same one on a hooker down the street."

"Are you giving beauty tips?" Emma laughed mirthlessly. "Do you own a fucking mirror?"

"Listen, this whole 'female professionals in the workplace' thing? I'm fine with it. But the problem, all due respect with you people, is that you get all excited, your emotions take over, your hormones kick in, you're riding the cotton pony, next thing you know," Whale pointed in the open door of their surveillance van to a live video feed of the inside of the club, "you're complimenting the bad guy on his fucking couch!"

"Well, all due respect to you, which 90's boy band inspired that bleach blonde hair cut?"

The shorter man who had been quiet up until now whistled to get everyone's attention and stop the screaming.

"Listen, dearies. We've been cramped inside this van for two months. We're not going to let you swoop in from nowhere and take all the credit."

"And who the fuck are you to tell us anything? You're way too fucking old to even be cooped up in a van doing intel. You look like you need a fucking cane."

Whale ignored Emma's bitching and glared at her, "I don't want to see you two anywhere near this case. We have got informants everywhere. We have got surveillance everywhere," he jerked his thumb over his shoulder motioning back at the video feed and Emma paled. Locksley was talking and laughing with two men, one of whom was August. "We do not need the two of you coming in with your estrogen flying at full speed fucking things up for us."

"Fuck you, Justin Timberlake."

"Not even on your birthday, sweetheart."

Regina reached out and grabbed Emma loosely by the wrist, pulling her away.

"That's right, keep walking."

"This isn't over!" she yelled back at him, but allowed herself to be led back to the Mercedes.

.

.

.

Regina drove Emma to her apartment in silence, allowing the blonde the quiet time to think before asking any questions. Now that she had parked it was time to spill.

"You want to tell me what was wrong back there?"

"Nothing," Emma sulked.

"I saw your face when you watched the footage. It looked like you saw someone you knew. Possibly your brother?"

Emma turned quickly to face her, "You did not read that from my fucking face." Scowling, she knew, "You read my file, didn't you? God you're an asshole!"

"Yes, I read it," Regina admitted sheepishly. "But it's my job to know everything about a case, including who I work with."

Emma crossed her arms, "I don't like that."

"We should talk to him tomorrow. Where is he?"

Emma sighed, "Probably Granny's."

"Well, then, let's go visit your family."

"No," Emma shook her head adamantly. "I can't go there."

"Why?"

"I'm the one that put him in jail!"

"Okay," Regina said slowly. "Nevermind."

Emma turned her head to look at the brunette defensively.

"It's not like I liked doing it! He got mixed up with a lot of really bad people. And then he started...he started using that shit. I had to get him out of there."

Emma sat back in her seat with a sigh, looking out the window deep in thought, her face reflecting the pain she felt.

"You know, ironically," Regina began rambling, trying to fill the once again awkward silence, "a lot of people become addicted when they're in prison. I think it's like 80-85% of the inmates require treatments."

All Emma could do was scowl at her.

"I hate you," she muttered, opening her door and leaving without another word.

.

.

.

The next morning, Regina woke up early and made her way into the kitchen for a cup of coffee. While waiting for it to brew, she started to trim some wheat grass for a shake and heard a faint rustling sound coming from the living room. Reaching under the dining table, she pulled out a concealed firearm, raising it defensively and quietly stalking towards the suspicious noise.

It was Emma, sitting on a couch, examining the material of her curtains by tugging on them and rubbing it between her fingers.

"These are cloth."

"What the eff?!"

"They're nice."

"I could have shot you!"

"Oh, I'm sorry. Do you not like someone invading your privacy?"

Regina lowered the gun, "I glanced at your file. You broke into my home!"

Emma shrugged, "I care about who I'm working with too." Pointing to one of the boxes she added, "And I'm a little uncomfortable with the fact that you feel the need to travel with trophies."

"It's not what you think," Regina rolled her eyes. "They moved me up here, rented this apartment, and that is all my personal belongings."

Emma glanced around her, "These four shitty, sad boxes...this is it? This is your life?"

"Yes."

"Oh, god. I don't think that could be any sadder if you threw it all in a trash bag and started dragging it behind you. Jesus, I thought I was the Oliver Twist here."

"What's sad is that jacket you insist on wearing," Regina snarked back.

"Yeah," Emma nodded mockingly, now looking through one of Regina's old yearbooks. "Real fancy-pants. I see it. I see it in here. Looks like you were pretty cool in high school, huh?"

"Yes. Yes, I was. But what--"

Emma held the yearbook up to a rather unflattering photo, "You weren't. You know what this girl's not? This girl's not cool." Flipping through some more pages she notices something off. "My favorite part is you only have two signatures...both by teachers. Mrs. Burke said, 'Have a good summer.' That's a personal touch. My real favorite though is this one. 'It'll get better'." She looked up then, challenging Regina to say something. "Now we're even."

"Fine."

Emma nodded once, then pushed the yearbook back in the box she had been rummaging in, standing up and stretching out her legs, ready to move past this disagreement from the night before and get to work on the case.

"Let's hit the road."

Regina gestured to the silk button down pajama top and pants she was wearing.

"I've got to change."

"What's the matter with your pantsuit?"

"It's pajamas."

"Well, excuse the shit out of me. I didn't realize you slept in a fucking tux. Go ahead, get your top hat."

.

.

.

They made their way up the steps to Granny's house, noting the 'Welcome Home August' sign over the door and the sound of an argument yelled loudly somewhere inside. Glancing nervously at Regina, Emma cleared her throat and pushed the door open, not bothering to knock. They walked in the dining room where a table was set with a large amount of food. Regina recognized a young blonde man and a brunette woman from the Christmas photo in Emma's apartment, Ruby, and two women she couldn't place.

"Oh, great," the blonde man looked up then, noticing Emma. "This asshole!"

Ruby pushed him, "Just take it easy."

"Well, well, well," the brunette sister drawled. "Look who it is."

Emma nodded at her siblings, "Kris. Lil."

Kristoff shook his head at her, disapprovingly.

"The rat's back in the house. Did you come back to arrest somebody else? You know, I saw Granny throw a can of Coke in the garbage the other day. Didn't recycle it! And I think she's splicing cable off the neighbors next door."

"Book her, Em. Get yourself some stripes!"

"How many songs have you downloaded illegally now off the internet, Lil? 5,000?"

Lily smirked, "Ten, twenty thousand."

"20,000!"

"Kris just stole a laptop from his work!"

"Stole? I fucking worked there for six weeks. I deserved to take it."

"Exactly."

"No health insurance. That balances out."

"But not you. You'll probably call in the SWAT team!"

Regina cleared her throat, "Actually, she could, because those are all horrible examples."

Granny walked back into the dining room from the kitchen then, a plate of hot food in her hands.

"Burgers are ready," she said, then noticing Emma, dropped the plate to the table with a thud and put her hands on her hips.

"Here we go," Emma mumbled with a sigh.

Glaring at her, Granny started to yell, "What kind of an animal throws her own brother in jail?"

"This kind of an animal," Kristoff pointed at Emma, "right here!"

Ruby pinched his underarm and made him yelp, "Shut up."

"How about who keeps him from killing himself?" Emma yelled back, "I was the only one that got him off the street. None of you fucks did!"

Suddenly, the red haired woman seated beside Kristoff spoke up, "You should never arrest your family!"

Emma gaped, "Who the fuck are you?"

"That's Anna," said the blonde woman Regina didn't recognize.

"Well, tell Anna I'm gonna strangle her at the table!" Emma yelled.

"She's my sister," the blonde woman yelled back. "You touch her, you gotta go through me first!"

Emma glared at her, "Who the fuck are _you_? I'll kill you, and kill her with your fucking dead body!"

Ruby stood from her seat then, "Everybody calm down. Emma's right. This one has no business chiming in on a family matter."

Kristoff turned and shot daggers at her, "This one? Why are you talking about my girlfriend like that?"

The arguing continued and the attention shifted off Emma as they began to once again bicker with each other. August walked in and smiled at the familiar sight, pulling Emma into a hug.

"Welcome home," he smiled down at her. "You here to arrest me?"

"I hope not," Emma told him seriously. "Let's go. We need to talk." Pushing him out of the room she pulled a chair out for Regina, "Sit down."

The fighting around her quieted and Regina took in her surroundings.

Noticing an odd painting she remarked, "That is one of the better...Jesus sports-themed paintings I've seen. It's very good. Nice."

Emma closed the door to the kitchen and shoved August hard.

"What are you doing at The Gold Club?"

Taking a step back he crossed his arms over his chest, "What are you, my mother? You're not Granny. How do you know I was there?"

"I know everything. Are you already working for those guys again?"

"No," he ran his hands through his hair nervously, "this guy Killian, he sent for me because he wants me to start working with him. But I told him no, I'm getting a straight job, and it's fine. Everybody's cool now," his hands were waving around while he spoke, revealing some skin on his forearm when his unbuttoned long sleeves fluttered in the air. "We parted amicably."

"What's that on your arm?" she asked, noticing red, raw flesh.

August dropped his arms to his sides and held them there stiffly.

"Nothing."

Emma's hand darted out quickly and grabbed him by the wrist.

"You want me to break your fucking wrist?"

She bent it at an awkward angle to make her point.

"Please, don't! No! Mercy, mercy, mercy!"

She released her hold on him, gruffly.

"Let me see it, Auggie."

Slowly, he rolled up his shirt sleeve, revealing five cigarette burns.

"It looks worse than it is. It's not a big deal. This guy Killian...he wants me to keep working for him. They like me."

Emma's jaw clenched as she seethed.

"Tell me where I can find Killian right now."

"No," August held his hands up. "Just stay out of it. They're maniacs. They'll chop you up, or gun you down, or worse."

"August, tell me what you fucking know!" Emma yelled.

"I don't know anything!" he yelled back, then winced when Emma slapped the side of his head. "Okay, okay! Archie Hopper. Okay? You know Archie Hopper?"

"Of course I do."

"He was gonna steal this huge shipment they got coming in, so they popped him. He's in the trunk of his Caddy under the Charles River Bridge."

Emma took a deep breath to clear her head before pointing at her brother, "I want you to stay in this house. If I catch you outside, I'll hurt you worse than them."

.

.

.

In the morgue, Emma confirmed the corpse on the slab was, in fact, Archie Hopper. The coroner directed them to a table where the victim's belongings were bagged as evidence.

"Any clue as to where the body was killed?" Emma asked the coroner while slipping on some latex gloves before handling the evidence. "We're still looking for their base camp."

"Well, if there's anything on him that will tell us," Regina said haughtily, "I will find it."

Emma rolled her eyes and started examining the victim's shoes. Noticing some white residue on the bottom she pointed it out to the brunette.

"Is that coke?"

Regina took a look, running her gloved finger over the shoe sole.

"I don't think so. It's more like a coating."

.

.

.

Back at the Boston field office Graham filled them in.

"Same traces found on all the victims' shoes. All of them had--"

"Epoxy powder coating." Regina interrupted. "Right?"

Graham nodded his head, "That's right. Each sample was made of the same ingredient. Which means--"

This time Emma interrupted him, eager to show off her own detective skills.

"They were all killed at the same place."

"Exactly," he nodded again. "I checked it out. There are three places that have this kind of powder--"

"Paint factory!" Regina yelled.

"Yeah."

Emma shook her head dismissively, "We all knew that."

Graham ignored their competitiveness and tilted his computer monitor towards them.

"Look at this," he pointed to a building on an aerial map with red arrows in four close locations. "This one right here is centered in the location--"

"Where all four dead bodies were found!" Regina and Emma yelled in unison.

"Right."

"Get me the address to that paint factory ASAP," Regina ordered him, then stood up to leave.

"Excuse me, Mills." Graham called out to her, awkwardly fidgeting in his seat. "Uh, I was wondering if, umm--"

"Oh. This is a little awkward," Regina sighed and held her hand out to stop him. "It's nothing personal, but as a rule I make it a point not to date my co-workers, so--"

"I was just wondering if you would not talk to me in that tone anymore."

Emma had been silently seething thinking Graham was going to ask Regina out too, but this turn of events now tickled her all over for several reasons. Sitting back in her seat with a smirk firmly in place she watched the awkwardness unfold in front of her.

"Oh!" Regina stuttered. "Yes, of course!"

Emma flashed a shit-eating grin and pointed up at Regina, "That's a little different."

"We should go...to the paint factory."

She jerked her thumb over her shoulder, signaling for Emma to follow her but she remained seated, holding her hands out in front of her between Regina and Graham.

"Are we clear here?" she asked, pointing between them. "Because it got real awkward."

"No, I think we're all good."

"Right?"

"We're really good. Same page."

Emma just continued to grin, "Because I don't want any bad--"

Regina pulled on the back of her red leather coat, tugging her up and out of her seat.

"Let's go to the paint factory," she again directed Emma, leading the way out of Graham's cubicle.

"She doesn't want to date co-workers," Emma told a random agent passing by, "so spread the word."

"Shut up."

.

.

.


	3. Bonding and Bed-Sharing

Regina and Emma entered the paint factory quietly, guns drawn. After doing a quick, silent sweep of the ground floor Regina tapped Emma and started making hand signals.

"What is that shit?" Emma huffed, frowning in confusion. Regina started making more hand signals, frustrating Emma who swatted the hand on her forearm away, "Stop it."

"Just cover me and go right," Regina hissed in a strained whisper.

"Well then say that! You make me want to shoot you."

They headed up a stair case which led them to an open third floor where voices could be heard in the distance. Ducking behind an open door they saw a man tied to a chair with Killian Jones and one of his henchman standing in front of him. Killian had his arms crossed over his chest, talking to the restrained man while the man next to him held a gun at his side, a bored expression on his face.

"We told you to stay out of the city." He sighed, "I honestly don't know what your problem is, mate. But now I've got to do something with you."

"Hook, I'm sorry," the restrained man plead with his captor. "I'll sell for you guys. Whatever you want me to do. I'm just trying to make some extra money. You can't blame me for that, right?"

"Relax," he said calmly. "I completely understand, mate."

"Thank you," the man sighed in relief.

"I'm not going to shoot you." Hook motioned with his head to the mand standing beside him, "He is."

The man jerked on his restraints and yelled "Wait! Hold on!" before a single bullet was fired, killing him instantly.

"Shit," Emma whispered, pushing herself back further from the door frame.

"If we grab Hook I can get into his head. We'll have Rumpelstiltskin by tonight."

Emma looked back around the corner sizing up their opponents.

"Two against two. I like those odds."

"I'll call for backup," Regina whispered, reaching for her cell phone in her coat pocket.

"It's already here," a male voice whispered menacingly before the sound of gun hammers cocking was heard behind them.

Turning, they saw Robin Locksley with two handguns pointed at their heads.

"Oh, hey!" Regina tried awkwardly in a last-ditch effort. "I was looking for you. I forgot to get your number."

"It's 1-800-GiveMeYourFuckingGuns."

After disarming them, he marched them around the corner to Hook, guns still pointed at their heads.

"I met these disasters at the club the other night."

Hook's eyebrow rose.

"And now they're both here. You think you might have been bugged?"

Robin scoffed, "Give me a break." Reaching in his pocket he pulled out his phone and started examining it. It didn't take him long to find the bug hidden in the battery port. "What the fuck!" He tossed the phone on the ground several feet away before shooting it. "Think you're hot shit? Guess what. You guys look even older in this lighting!"

"Come on," Regina whined.

"Fuck you," Emma muttered.

Robin turned his anger on Emma.

"Fuck you! It's not fuck me. It's fuck you. You know why?" He sauntered over from his position between the women to directly behind Emma, leaning down to speak lowly in her ear, "Because I'm about to fuck you up."

Reaching blindly behind her, Emma grabbed the gun Robin had taken from her and stored in the front pocket of his jeans and knocked her head back, butting him in the face and knocking him out. She fired quickly, shooting the man beside Hook in the chest. Hook dropped low and reached for the fallen man's firearm.

"Pick it up," Emma barked. "Do it. Give me a reason to shoot you in the face."

Hook smirked and raised his hands in surrender.

.

.

.

"How long is this going to take?"

Regina held two cups of coffee while Emma fumed outside an interrogation room.

"Maybe 12 hours, hopefully less. I have to find out what drives him."

Emma scoffed, unimpressed and impatient.

"We could just beat him with a phone book."

"No! For so many reasons, no. You just need to be patient, all right? It is crucial that you remain patient. If you enter that room, you could break the bond we have created. Okay? Just please, please trust me on this one. Do you understand how important this is?"

"Yeah," Emma sighed. "I do."

Regina narrowed her eyes, "And you will be patient?"

"I will," Emma nodded calmly in agreement.

"Okay." Regina gave her a small smile before brushing off her pantsuit and walking slowly into the interrogation room. "Hello," she greeted their prisoner, placing one of the two cups on the table in front of him. "Coffee? I drink a little more coffee than I probably should," she chuckled, taking the seat across from him.

She had barely settled into the seat when the interrogation room door was yanked open and Emma pushed her brunette head out of the way, hurling a phone book at Hook and hitting him square in the face.

"Where's Rumpelstiltskin?!"

Regina jumped up from her chair in a fury, "You couldn't wait ten seconds?!"

Regina pushed past Emma to close the door and Hook just shook his head at her and chuckled.

"What's so funny?"

"You," he told the blonde. "Thinking you're going to make me talk."

"You're talking right now, dumbass."

"Your surname is Swan. Ain't that right, love? You look more like an ugly duckling to me."

"Oh, surprisingly catty. You're a fucking genious. That's the first time I've ever heard that joke!"

Regina pulled Emma back and whispered, "I asked you to stay outside."

"I need to go tough on him!"

Regina scowled at her, "Are you not already doing that?"

"No! I'm doing good cop, bad cop."

"You know, I can hear you," Hook taunted.

"Shut up!"

"Just please," Regina almost begged, "don't do anything crazy."

"I won't do anything crazy," Emma said, her voice going back to a normal volume. "What am I gonna do that's crazy?" Walking around the table, she sat on the edge of it. "Huh? Am I gonna shoot you in the dick?"

She drew her gun and cocked the hammer, pointing it at Killian's lap while Regina yelled behind her.

"You said nothing crazy!"

"Turn around," Emma muttered over her shoulder. "I need you to pass a polygraph."

"Put it away!"

"Turn around!"

"Don't worry," Killian replied coolly. "She won't do it. She won't do anything."

"So you want to gamble with your scrotum and your testicles? Okay, gamble away!"

"Just go to the corner!"

Regina huffed before turning to face the wall, "I'm in it!"

"I'll tell you what we're gonna do... We're gonna play a little game. I'm gonna take out these bullets," Emma opened the chamber, dropping the six bullets into her palm, "...except this one," she held one bullet up, then reloaded it in her gun, "...because it's my favorite. I'm gonna keep that in there. And then you're gonna tell me where Rumpelstiltskin is. And you're gonna tell me when and where that shipment is coming in. Okay?" Closing the chamber on the gun, she gave it a spin, then cocked the hammer and pointed it back at Killian's crotch. "Right now."

Killian merely glanced between the gun and the blonde seated before him, then answered without a care in the world.

"I'm gonna kill you and everyone you know."

Emma pulled the trigger.

"Yeah, that's not what I fucking asked you. Is it?"

Killian startled at the sound. He didn't think she would call his bluff.

"Pantsuit, take the gun from her!"

"Now you want me to save your scrotum!"

"When is the shipment coming in?"

"I don't know."

Emma pulled the trigger again and this time Regina and Killian jumped.

"Ah!"

"Okay! All right! There's a shipment on Wednesday!"

"Where?"

"I don't know!" Emma pulled the trigger again and Killian jerked back so hard his chair caught a little air. "I swear! I don't know!"

"Tell her!" Regina shouted at him, "Just tell her where it is!"

"Jesus Christ! Don't shoot me in the dick!" Emma pulled the trigger again as beads of sweat rolled down Killian's face and his skin turned red from yelling and stress. "I don't know! It's happening on a Wednesday! That's four shots! Don't take anymore bloody shots! Don't shoot my dick off!"

"Just tell her where it's coming in!"

"I don't know! Don't shoot me in the dick!"

Emma pulled the trigger again and the door was yanked open. Killian's screams for mercy were drowned out by Regina's boss's orders for them to leave the room.

.

.

.

Emma stood beside Regina, being lectured by her boss Maleficent and the two DEA agents, Whale and Beastly.

"You brought Hook and Locksley in?" Whale seethed. "What are you out of your fucking minds?"

Beastly shook his head, "Wasn't very smart, dearies."

"Oh," Regina scoffed, "so you're not supposed to arrest someone when they commit murder and try to kill you? You wanted us to keep them on the street?"

"You shouldn't even have been there! Rumpelstiltskin is the big catch, not those two! Now we're never going to be able to--"

Maleficent raised her hand to quiet his screeching.

"Victor, enough. Calm down. We can all hear you."

"Yeah," Emma rolled her eyes. "Dogs can hear you."

"Of course dogs can hear me!"

"Shouldn't you be resting your vocal chords? Don't you have a Backstreet Boys reunion concert to make?"

"Mills. Come here," Maleficent ordered Regina before pulling her away from the group by her bicep. Emma followed behind the pair, standing next to Regina defensively. Maleficent glanced at her briefly, "Can I have a moment with my agent, please?"

Emma looked to Regina who gave a small nod.

"I'm good."

"All right," Emma gave in. "I'm gonna be right over there." She pointed to a desk several feet away. "Right there."

Regina almost laughed when Emma raised her pointer and middle fingers, gesturing between her eyes and Maleficent, miming that she would be watching as she walked away. The older woman merely rolled her eyes before turning her full attention back on Regina.

"Why didn't you alert anyone once you found evidence of Hook's whereabouts?"

"Ma'am, it was an unconfirmed lead. I wasn't going to waste anyone's time until I knew it was real."

"Just give it a rest," Maleficent barked. "I want you to stand down while I figure out how to repair all this shit with the DEA."

"Mal, no. Please," Regina implored. "I swear I've been doing everything you sent me out here to do. We've been doing such good work."

Maleficent raised her hand, this time to quiet Regina.

"I know you are. It's just," she sighed. "It's...never easy when you're involved, Regina."

Maleficent shook her head and stormed away, leaving a shocked and hurt Regina behind. The brunette stood frozen in place, the words washing over her. Emma had heard everything and she saw the pain in Regina's eyes. She walked over, giving her an awkward pat to the arm.

"Fuck her," she scoffed. "If you're not in trouble, you're not doing your job."

Regina gave Emma a short, unconvincing chuckle and a small, watery smile.

"Yeah," she said with a sniff.

"We should go get a drink. Right?" She fought to make eye contact with Regina and gave her a small smile of her own before realizing she had never removed her hand from Regina's arm. Rather than drop her hand like she had touched an electric fence, she allowed herself to run it comfortingly up and down Regina's arm. "What's the point of being a cop if you can't get one drink at the end of the night?"

.

.

.

Once again the pair found themselves at Lucas's.

"That's what I'm talking about!" Emma cheered when Ruby slid six shot glasses in front of them.

Regina grimaced, "I said I just want one."

"Oh, no, no, no. Here," Emma reached over the bar and grabbed two rocks glasses. "It is one," she poured three shots in each glass. "Sometimes she just likes to do this thing where she pours them in three little glasses, but it's really one." She grinned mischievously when she heard Regina scoff. "All right," she slid the now full glass to Regina, "here we go! Let's loosen that up."

"Okay," Regina sighed.

They clinked their glasses together before Emma slammed all three shots as quickly as possible and Regina tentatively sipped.

"There you go," Emma instructed, tilting the glass back further and making Regina drink it all at once. "Keep a pace. Don't spit that shit out." Regina sputtered. It was like slowly downing gasoline. "It's not free." Ruby chuckled and Emma winked. It was definitely free. The first round at least. "Let's go. Keep that in."

"Ooh," Regina exhaled breathily and Emma's grin could have lit up the room.

"Hey, Rubes," she called her sister over. "Can we get two more..." she held up six fingers when Regina wasn't looking, "...shots?"

.

.

.

It wasn't long before Ruby had to clear away the shot glasses, rocks glasses Emma transferred the many shots to, and now beer glasses. The bar in front of them looked like a war zone, so much alcohol consumed in so little time. They must have had a shitty day, but she couldn't help but notice the way Emma's eyes seemed to light up whenever she teased the brunette seated beside her or the little smirk that brunette had when she gave Emma back as good as she got.

Emma was now sipping a beer, listening while Regina pulled apart a napkin and vented.

"I don't know, dear. It's hard. I know we're not supposed to say this, but being a woman in this field is hard. Men are just so intimidated by me, which is like...why?"

Emma nodded along, "And then you put your personality on top of that and it is...it is off-putting."

"You know," Regina drawled, offended by Emma's jab. "I was actually engaged."

"Was he a hearing man?"

Regina glared at her.

"Yes." She shredded some more of the napkin, "He was wonderful, but he didn't understand how much this job meant to me. Eventually I thought it would be best to just...be alone rather than to compromise the work."

"I get that."

"It's kind of weird that it does get lonely...a little bit."

Emma glanced Regina and saw the pain back in her eyes. She sighed and decided to offer up some of herself in exchange for the brunette's honesty.

"Before Granny took me in, I had nothing. Once I got my family, I really just wanted to hang out with my brothers and sisters but, besides Ruby...they just all turned out to be pretty terrible people," she laughed into her drink. "So that's kind of a bummer."

Regina placed her hand over Emma's, "Your family loves you." Noticing the heaviness surrounding them, both from the conversation and her touch, she slowly withdrew her hand and tried to joke. "I mean, in their own unique way." She chuckled and Emma gave her a grateful smile. "They love you, and that's a wonderful..." she lost her train of thought looking into Emma's green eyes. "It's very unique," she finished with a cough to mask the sudden nerves she was feeling.

"That sounds like it's coming from somebody that's an only child," Emma laughed.

Regina smirked, "I have an older half-sister. She really is a terrible person."

.

.

.

Ruby realized she should have cut them off a long time ago, but they were having fun and Emma looked so goddamned happy, she just couldn't say no. Well, that and seeing the drunk duo in action together was fucking hysterical.

More shots lead to more chasers, which Emma insisted meant beer, not juice or lime. More shots and more chasers lead to pool, darts, poker, dancing, off-key singing to the loud music coming from the jukebox, and now pushing the button for the same fucking song on that loud ass fucking jukebox over and over. It might have been funny at one point, but now it was getting old and Ruby was ready to call it a night.

Just as Regina went to the jukebox to, no doubt select the same song again, Ruby pulled the plug on the machine.

"No!" she yelled at them, holding the cord up for them to see it was no longer connected to power. "Stop playing that song!"

"Why?!" Regina challenged her.

"Because you played it 26 fucking times!"

"Hey!" Emma got between them. "She had a horrible, fucking miserable day." She pointed at Regina and wobbled in place, "Look at her! Play the goddamn song!"

"Don't you fucking swear at me!"

Emma laughed and now pointed at Ruby, "You just fucking sweared!"

"It's swore," Ruby laughed with an eye roll. "And I think it's time you sleep it off."

"Slept," Regina tried to correct her, then hiccuped. "Or is it sleeped? _Sleep?_ Sleep it off? Sleeped it off."

"You too. Time for bed."

Ruby pushed them out the door with her before she locked up, then marched them toward her room. Emma went to open the door but Ruby shook her head.

"Well where are we supposed to sleep?" Emma whined.

Pulling out her skeleton key, Ruby unlocked the room next to hers.

"I don't want you throwing up in my room and I don't feel like sharing my bed."

Emma flung her coat on the chair next to the door and dropped dramatically to the bed so hard she bounced and rolled off onto the floor.

"Ouch!"

"Good luck," Ruby laughed before pushing Regina further inside.

"Wait," Regina looked around, confused. "There's only one bed."

Ruby smirked, "You're grownups. I think you'll survive."

The door clicked shut behind Regina as Emma sat up and back on the palms of her hands, still sprawled out haphazardly across the floor.

"Give me a hand," she instructed, lifting one of hers so Regina could pull her to her feet.

Regina rolled her eyes but complied, joining their hands and helping the blonde up. She pulled with a little more force than necessary and in their drunken state the pair wobbled together, Emma's body crashing into Regina's. They were chest to chest, closer than they had ever been, staring at each other and sharing the air between them. Emma's hands had come up to brace herself for impact and were now resting softly against Regina's shoulders. Slowly, she drug them down Regina's arms and caressed patterns against the brunette's skin before settling loosely around her wrists. Regina's hands rested firmly on Emma's hips.

"You're not still upset about what your boss said, are you?" Emma asked softly, getting just a weak shrug in response from the brunette. "It's been a really long day and we've had a lot to drink. And," she was drowning in chocolate eyes that flicked down to her lips, then back to her own green orbs, "you've just got to let that go."

Regina started to lean in to capture soft pink lips, "And how do you suggest I do that, Detective Swan?"

A knock at the door startled them, making them spring apart. Emma stomped over to it and yanked it open, revealing a very amused looking Ruby.

"What?" she barked with a scowl.

Ruby laughed, "Easy, tiger. I come bearing gifts." Pushing a handful of items into Emma's chest, she told her, "Doubt you want to sleep in those skinny jeans, so I brought some clothes you left lying around. Maybe you'd rather sleep in nothing," she wiggled her eyebrows at Emma, not missing the blush that started forming on her cheeks or how Regina turned away, "but I've got some extra toothbrushes, Tylenol, and other shit to get you through the night here too. Now behave," she gave Emma a wink, "and try not to destroy the place."

"Thanks," Emma muttered quietly. Unable to stay angry at her sister for a number of reasons, she allowed herself to give her a small, shy smile before closing the door and locking it. "So..." she drawled out, turning back to Regina as an air of stifling awkward tension and undeniable lust slowly eased its way over them. 

She shifted everything to one arm so she could stuff her free hand into the back pocket of her jeans, her tell for nerves.

"I'm going to take a shower," Regina said quickly, turning to leave the room as quickly as possible. 

.

.

.

Regina emerged from the bathroom wrapped in a towel and stealing shy glances at Emma, who slipped past her quickly mumbling something about it being her turn. She heard the water turn back on and saw the blonde had used one toothbrush and left the other near the sink for her next to a bottle of water, two pain relievers, and a change of clothes. Dropping her towel, she quickly changed into the short sleeping shorts and oversized Red Sox t-shirt, soft from many washes and over-use. She inhaled deeply, the smell of shampoo from the shower mingling with the smell of detergent on the old shirt. She didn't expect it to smell so much like Emma.

The realization that she knew what Emma smelled like enough to identify a familiar scent was both startling and endearing, much like the memories of the almost-kiss now seared into her brain. 

Hair and teeth brushed, Regina took the pain relievers and drank half the bottle of water, already feeling more sober and relaxed from the shower. She made her way to the bed and crawled under the covers as the door to the bathroom opened and Emma emerged in boy short underwear and a tank top. She briefly considered brushing her blonde locks, still wavy and wet from the shower, but settled for simply shaking her hair out of the excess water.

Whatever snarky comment Regina was going to make about Emma shaking her hair out like a dog died on her lips as she watched Emma stretch, pulling a hooded sweatshirt over her head, the tank top rising up and the flesh of her stomach glistening in the low light coming from beyond the bathroom door. Holding a water bottle to her lips, she drained the contents and grabbed another, before flicking the remaining lights off and making her way to the bed. She surprised Regina by walking past the unoccupied portion of the bed and standing at Regina's side, holding the water bottle out to the brunette.

"Drink more water or your head will want to fucking explode in the morning," she said quietly before turning and checking the door and windows to ensure they were securely locked. Noticing Regina's puzzled look, she shrugged. "I know you said my apartment isn't safe, but..." She shrugged again, "Habit."

"Thank you," Regina said sincerely, shaking the water bottle and giving Emma a small smile.

"Don't sweat it."

She hoped it was dark enough Regina wouldn't notice the pink tinting her cheeks or her apparent nerves as she climbed onto the bed beside her. The brunette placed the now empty bottle on the nightstand and settled into the mattress, rolling on her side to face Emma.

"I didn't just mean for the water," she confessed, slowly reaching out one hand to gently tug on the draw string of Emma's hoodie. "I had fun tonight...which is not something I do often."

"I believe you," Emma teased, an affectionate smirk on her lips.

"Shut up," Regina chuckled with a smile, leaning in closely as she spoke, the words mumbled against Emma's lips.

The kiss started out slow and sweet and tasted like minty toothpaste. Regina ran her fingers through Emma's still wet hair before gently caressing her cheek with her finger tips making Emma sigh contentedly. Running her tongue along Regina's bottom lip made the brunette deepen the kiss and Emma swallowed the moan she caused when she bit it. She tugged on it with her teeth, releasing it with a pop and they broke apart for air, breath coming in deep, ragged gasps.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," she pulled back slightly, forehead resting against Regina's, eyes closed and head swimming, drunk on something entirely new. "What's going on? You and I just made out." She opened her eyes and saw the lust she was feeling mirrored in Regina's eyes, "You and I are making out?"

Regina chuckled, "Well not anymore."

"But we don't do that."

She was confused and the throbbing between her legs wasn't helping her think any clearer.

"I know. I just thought it would be fun," Regina said, her voice coming out raspy. "I'm afraid I'm not quite done having fun with you tonight, dear."

The want in her voice made Emma's heart race.

"How drunk are you?" she asked, concerned the brunette would regret this later.

Regina resumed playing with Emma's draw strings, tugging gently on both as she bit her own bottom lip, a lip which still tingled thanks to Emma.

"Drunk enough that I know I want to do this, not so drunk that you should feel guilty about taking advantage."

The answer seemed to relax Emma once more and she smiled.

"Well, that's the perfect amount."

Regina threaded the draw strings through her fingers several more times before laying them gently across Emma's chest. She had never seen the blonde look so calm and it made her appear younger and impossibly more pretty. Noting the hungry look in green eyes that had darkened with lust Regina quickly grabbed a handful of the hoodie with her fist, pulling Emma closer.

She kissed her deeply, feeling Emma's moan on her lips travel all the way to the pit of her stomach where it settled as a ball of need. Moving Emma by the fabric of the sweatshirt she still had bunched in her hand, she pulled the blonde on top of her so she now straddled her hips.

"You know what's weird?" she said breathily, "This doesn't feel weird. And you're a really good kisser."

Emma just smirked before capturing her lips again in another heated kiss. Regina ran her hands up Emma's arms, pulling her closer by her shoulders as Emma ground her center down against the brunette's. Emma was caught off guard when Regina suddenly pushed her back, confusion on her face.

"What's wrong?"

"As much as I love pulling you around by that thing," she ran her hands up Emma's torso, cupping her breasts over her sweatshirt and tank top, "you're wearing too many layers."

Emma grinned mischievously before grabbing the hoodie by the hem around her waist and pulling it free, shaking her blonde curls loose.

She smirked, "Better?"

Regina shook her head no and sat up slightly, biting her lip and removing Emma's tank top herself. Cupping the blonde's face with one hand and steadying both of their bodies with the other she kissed Emma's breath away.

Pulling apart just long enough to yank Regina's shirt off and throw it somewhere across the room, Emma made her hum in satisfaction when she began kissing her way down the brunette's neck. Pushing gently between Regina's breasts, Emma directed her back down to the mattress before sliding down the brunette's body and sucking a nipple into her mouth. Regina's back arched and she moaned loud and low in her throat, pushing her hips up against Emma for more friction.

After bathing the left nipple in attention, Emma kissed across Regina's chest to her right nipple, repeating the process as her hand slowly slid its way down smooth olive skin to the dampness between Regina's legs. Cupping her sex made Regina's hands fly up from the sheets she had been holding onto with white knuckles, grabbing a fistful of Emma's hair and pulling the blonde off her breast with a pop, taking her lips with her own in another deep, searing kiss.

Their tongues danced together as Emma's hand rubbed up and down the fabric of the sleep shorts the brunette had borrowed, feeling how wet she was. Regina's legs parted more, allowing Emma more room as her back arched and her hips pushed up, wanting more friction.

"Please," she whispered desperately.

"Please what," Emma whispered back, resuming kissing Regina's neck.

"Please, Emma."

Emma squeezed Regina's inner thigh almost hard enough to bruise, causing Regina to gasp and drag her nails down the blonde's back. She cupped her sex again roughly and drew deep circles over Regina's clit with her fingers, the fabric of the shorts now soaked with the brunette's need. 

"Tell me what you want," she husked in Regina's ear.

"I want you," Regina answered honestly.

The girl was driving her crazy. She was already so close and she hadn't even directly touched her in the place she needed it most.

"Tell me," she pushed the shorts aside, not bothering to remove them, "what you want."

Her voice was low and it sent a shiver down Regina's spine. She dragged her fingers down the lips of the brunette's pussy, gathering wetness before resuming the hard circular motions against the soaked flesh, the material of the shorts bunched against her wrist instead of seperating skin from skin contact.

" _Please_ , Emma."

She didn't care her voice was begging now.

"You're so fucking wet," Emma licked her lips, "I can't wait to taste you." She kissed Regina quickly before looking her right in the eye, pupils blown. "And no panties? Jesus, I bet you can't wait for me to taste you either."

"Emma, please," Regina moaned, "please fuck me. I can't wait anymore."

Not only hearing Regina tell her what she wanted, but to actually hear the brunette swear pushed Emma over the edge. With a growl she pushed two fingers inside Regina quickly, pumping them in and out while Regina's hands dropped from her back, slamming to her sides and once again reaching blindly for the sheets, needing something to hold onto.

Emma fucked her with her fingers, twisting them with every push inside. When Regina's head flew back and her eyes slammed shut Emma couldn't take it anymore. She quickly moved down the brunette's body, finally pulling the shorts down her legs and tossing them over her shoulder carelessly before running her tongue up the brunette's slit.

"Mm," she hummed, satisfied and Regina felt it against her clit. "You taste so fucking good."

Regina's hips jerked up and she rocked them into Emma's eager mouth before the blonde pushed her down and held her in place, one hand around her hip, the other splayed out across her stomach to keep her still.

"Fuck, Emma," Regina moaned again, her hand back in the blonde's hair, pulling her impossibly closer and writhing beneath the tongue that was making her toes curl.

Emma growled again at Regina's cursing and nipped at the clit before flicking it with quick, firm strokes from her tongue. She noticed Regina's hips had started rocking faster, her breathing was getting shallower, and her tugging on Emma's hair was getting harder. She pulled her mouth off just long enough to slip her fingers back inside.

"Are you going to cum for me?"

Regina nodded, unable to form any words then let loose a strangled cry when Emma added a third finger.

"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes..."

Her left hand pulled Emma's hair again, directing her back to her clit while her right hand slammed to the mattress, hitting it with every cry of pleasure. Emma sucked the bundle of nerves into her mouth and Regina saw sparks behind her eyes, she saw fireworks, she saw magic. The orgasm hit her hard, her hips jerked and her body went stiff and she cried out. Emma slowly eased her fingers out and licked her mess away, making her body twitch with small aftershocks of pleasure.

She kissed her way back up Regina's body before falling to the mattress beside her, settling next to her in the same position they started in, on her side gazing at the brunette in front of her when a thought that startled her out of her moment of bliss rattled her. 

"We never actually discussed what this lapse in judgement is, so if you want to just write it off as a one time thing--"

Regina was still recovering, panting on her back, one arm flung over her eyes, but with her free hand she blindly reached for Emma, tangling their fingers and mumbling "shush, you're ruining my afterglow," before giving the blonde's palm a quick kiss and placing it over her heaving chest and pounding heart. When her breathing finally settled she lifted the arm covering her face and cracked one eye, squinting in the dark with a smile on her face.

"Hey," Emma whispered, a smug smirk firmly in place.

Regina chuckled, then turned a little more on her side so she could fully face Emma, "Hey." She ran her fingers through blonde curls, brushing them off Emma's face. She couldn't tell if the dampness she felt was from the shower anymore or from the sweat exerted getting her off.

Emma chuckled thinking about the lunch they had earlier that day, "Still think I eat like a child?"

Regina laughed and gently smacked her arm before affectionately running her fingers over the smooth pale skin, down her back, settling on her hip. She snapped the elastic of the boy shorts Emma was still wearing.

"You're still wearing too many layers," she whispered before stealing another kiss and rolling on top of the blonde.

.

.

.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whenever I see "bed sharing" in tags I know someone's getting laid.


	4. The Heat

When Ruby opened the door with her skeleton key several hours later she wasn't really surprised to see Emma curled around Regina, spooning the brunette in her sleep, or the clothes thrown around the room.

"Ahem," she cleared her throat loudly. Emma grumbled but didn't open her eyes and Regina didn't flinch. Figuring she would need to be a little more abrasive to get them moving, she tried yelling. "Rise and shine, officers!"

"Ruby," Emma groaned. "Go away."

"And how is everyone feeling on this fine, beautiful morning?"

"I feel like if you don't shut up I'm going to fucking murder you."

Regina rolled over and buried her face in Emma's neck before pulling her pillow over her head to muffle the sounds of the sisters bantering.

"Well, look," Ruby drawled in a bored tone, "I just thought you'd like to know your Mercedes is about to leave the property."

Regina shot up, "What? Why?"

"You gave it away last night. Or do you not remember?" Her face broke out in an evil grin. "I wonder what else you don't remember giving away last night," she said with a wink, enjoying the way the brunette's cheeks turned rosy and she struggled between pulling the sheets up to cover her naked skin and wanting to leap from the bed and find her car.

"Why would I give my car away? Who did I give it to?"

"You lost it playing poker," Ruby explained easily like this was an everyday thing at Lucas's. "Dopey came back this morning to pick it up."

"Dopey?" Regina's face scrunched in confusion.

"I don't know what his real name is," Ruby sighed. "He's a little dopey looking guy. Am I supposed to remember everyone's name? Isn't it enough I stalled him with breakfast so you could have enough time to get dressed and make him give it back?"

That was all Regina needed to hear to jump into action. Ruby laughed and closed the door to give them some privacy, hearing the mumbling and bickering while they dressed, the thump of Emma, no doubt, falling down while shimmying into her skinny jeans, and minutes later the door was yanked open and they followed Ruby towards the parking lot.

Regina held a hand up to protect her eyes from the bright sunlight while she checked her phone.

"Oh, Jesus. Ten missed messages," she huffed.

"There he is," Ruby pointed to a short man stumbling towards Regina's Mercedes.

Regina held her phone up to her ear and pushed Emma's shoulder.

"Would you go get him, please?"

Emma sighed and sauntered ahead, yelling out to him as he opened the driver door, definitely not taking her aggression out on the little guy because she suddenly felt terribly whipped.

"Hey! Get out of the car, asshole!"

As soon as he sat in the driver's seat, the car exploded. The windows shattered. The hood, trunk, and doors popped open. The alarm went off. Dust and debris fell all around them. The car was left a flaming hunk of scrap metal, burning in the remains of a fireball.

"Oh, shit!" Emma coughed, standing back up from where she had been knocked down by the blast.

Regina stood up as well, dusting her pants off where she had fallen and stared open-mouthed at the inferno that used to be her car.

"Oh my god."

.

.

.

Firefighters were the first to respond to the scene, followed quickly by Maleficent and DEA Special Agents Whale and Beastly who filled them in on the information that had been left on Regina's voicemail.

The brunette gaped, "How did Hook escape?"

Maleficent sighed, "Federal Marshals transferring him got ambushed. We're not sure whether Rumpelstiltskin's men followed the marshals or got information from the inside."

"You don't think it's a little obvious?!" Emma shouted, pointing at Whale.

"Fuck you!"

"I know when I smell a fucking rat and it's you, One Direction."

"If you want to point a finger around here, why don't you point it back at yourself?" Whale yelled, ignoring Maleficent when she held her hand up to quiet him. "No! If you two hadn't brought Hook in, Rumpelstiltskin would have never known we were on to him and then this whole case wouldn't be the giant mixed-up bucket of shit that it is now!"

Beastly nodded beside him, "Now Rumpel knows who you are, and Hook is angry as shit. If I were you, I would get out of town, dearies."

Regina smirked condescendingly, "You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

"Mills," Maleficent crossed her arms. "He's right. This isn't a choice."

Regina was about to argue when her phone beeped. Glancing down at the screen she saw it was an incoming picture message from a private number.

"No!" Emma yelled. "No way! You're not my boss, lady! And even if you were, you still couldn't stop me. I have more invested in this case than any of you assholes and now you fucked it up, didn't you?" She stopped her rant when Regina nudged her, discreetly showing her the screen of the phone. It was a picture of Emma's family. The same Christmas photo Regina had seen in Emma's apartment. She rolled her eyes at the image, "Yeah, thanks. That's another fucked up area of my life. Thanks for bringing it up."

"No," Regina murmured quietly. "That was just sent to me."

Emma took a deep breath and handed Regina back her phone, then faced Maleficent and the agents with her hands up in surrender.

"Okay," she sighed. "Fine. I guess I'm out of line, huh? I'll step back and see what you assholes can do. Go USA," she cheered mockingly before turning away, pulling Regina with her. "Let's go. We've gotta get my family out. They're gonna kill them."

Regina nodded in agreement, "I'll talk to Mal. The FBI can arrange everything."

"No way. Are you kidding? We got a mole in there. I'm assuming it's that Jonas Brother," she looked back over her shoulder at Whale who was scowling, watching them walk away, "but we are going in there by ourselves and doing it now. Are you with me or not?"

Regina tangled their fingers together.

"Of course I am, dear."

.

.

.

"This is bullshit!" Kristoff yelled. "Why should we uproot our lives because you're an asshole?"

"Don't talk to her like that," August pushed him out the door. "It's not her fault."

"You want to bring everyone?" Regina asked incredulously, watching the entire family filing out carrying their respective luggage.

"No," Emma shrugged, "but it'd be like Schindler's List."

"Where are you going?" Regina asked Lily, who was trying to sneak back upstairs. "Go outside."

"Fuck you, I live here."

"Go get in the van you fucking brat," Emma yelled at her.

Lily got close to challenge her, then laughed.

"Is that a hickey?"

One of Emma's hands flew to her neck and the other pushed Lily out the door as Kristoff came walking back up the steps, a bat in his hands.

"Why the fuck do you have that?" Emma asked, already exasperated with her youngest brother.

"Just let 'em try to come over here, Em," he muttered, dropping it loudly into an open palm. "Just let 'em try."

"They're not gonna throw baseballs at you. They're gonna shoot you, moron. Get in the fucking van."

Regina gave up trying to shepherd everyone into the vehicle and left Emma to complete that particular task, instead sitting in the driver's seat of the van, waiting for the family to finish loading up so they could leave.

She rubbed her temple, the headache she felt since she woke up building and she couldn't decide if that was because of her hangover, her car exploding, or this family.

Lily approached the driver's window Regina had left partially rolled down.

"Hi," she smiled at Regina for the first time, trying to win her over. "Can I drive?"

"No," Regina rolled her eyes and pointed around the car, "but if you could make your way around--"

"Get out and let me drive," she interrupted. "I'm a really good driver."

"Emma!" Regina yelled.

The blonde screamed several more colorful threats at her family and when that didn't manage to get everyone's attention she pulled her gun out and started waving it around.

Regina heard August laugh in the back seat.

"That got them moving, huh?"

Regina chuckled before awkwardly realizing she had just spent the night with his sister. "Your family seems nice."

He chuckled, "Yeah, we have our good days."

Emma pushed them all in the van but before she could finish securing them inside Kristoff stuck his arm out to stop the rolling door.

"We gotta get Anna."

"For what?"

"Because you put her fucking life in danger!"

Emma rolled her eyes, "Nobody gives a shit about her."

"If I'm going, Anna's going." When Emma didn't acknowledge his demand he tried to push past her and climb back out. "I'm not going unless we get Anna!"

Emma pushed him back inside the van, "Fine!"

"We're getting Anna!"

"I said fine! Put your feet inside before I chop them off!"

Slamming the door closed she huffed before taking her position in the passenger seat next to Regina who looked over at her and clasped her hands to her heart dramatically.

"My savior!" she teased. 

Emma rolled her eyes and grumbled, "I hope a truck hits us and we all die."

.

.

.

Emma and Regina left August, Lily, Anna, and Elsa to find spare rooms at Lucas's, Kristoff posted outside with his bat, and went to have breakfast in the diner out back. Granny and Ruby insisted they weren't going to miss work and Emma gave in because at least this way they could still keep an eye on them.

Emma directed Regina to a booth in the corner before following Granny into the kitchen, coming back with two mugs of coffee.

"My savior," Regina said again, sounding far less mocking than she had in the car, and hummed appreciatively with her first sip. She noticed Emma's eyes darkened, no doubt recalling the other ways she had made the brunette hum like that the night before. "Focus," she teased with a smirk.

"Shut up," the blonde mumbled, unable to shake the silly grin from her face.

Regina scrolled through the messages on her phone before placing it aside.

"If we just knew where that shipment was coming to, we would have Rumpelstiltskin and Hook. They would both be there, and we could get them," she huffed, annoyed.

Emma slid Regina the menu she knew by heart, "I'm just happy that August is out of there for now."

"Yeah," Regina nodded, the wheels in her head turning. "Shame, though. Having your brother on the inside would be a coup for us."

Emma lowered the brunette's menu, making eye contact and frowning.

" _That's_ what you want to go with? Because you're saying that out loud."

Regina scoffed, "You would say the exact same thing if it wasn't your brother, and you know that."

"We're done talking about this."

"So if it was just some random drug dealer, you wouldn't send him back in? If it was someone like Cassidy--"

Emma crossed her arms defensively and scowled.

"We're not talking about Cassidy, we're talking about my brother."

"We all have a lot to lose if we don't catch Rumpelstiltskin."

"What do you have to lose?"

"I have a lot."

Emma continued to rage, not seeing the care in Regina's eyes.

"Some bullshit promotion? You don't give a shit about my family or if August goes out there and gets killed."

"I feel you're not being honest because nobody forced your brother to get involved with drugs."

Emma pointed at her, "You're an asshole for that."

"Okay, that's not helping either," Regina sighed, knowing this was going nowhere. She let Emma sit for a moment in silence to cool down before reaching across the table and gently untangling the blonde's arms from across her chest. "I'm trying to create a dialogue," she said softly. "Note that I start my statements with 'I feel'."

"Okay. I feel like you're an asshole."

"I feel like you've worn that hideous jacket every day since I met you."

"I feel like, maybe you don't like this jacket as much as that hoodie last night, but you're still fond of it."

"Oh, really? Well, I feel I disagree."

Emma sat back in her seat, "Must be nice."

"What?"

"Must be really nice for you to know everything. To be so much smarter than everybody else."

Regina rolled her eyes, "I don't profess to know everything, but I do know quite a bit. What I know is accurate and scientifically proven, and I share that information with you. If you have a problem with that, tune me out like you always do."

"I feel like--"

Regina's phone ringing interrupted Emma.

"Mills," Regina answered quickly, then rolled her eyes and handed the phone to Emma. "Why don't you have your own phone?"

"Who am I, the Queen of England?" Emma replied sarcastically before throwing her own phone on the table with a loud thump. "Dead battery."

"I don't know, does the Queen of England only wear skinny jeans?"

"Fuck you."

"You," Regina pointed at her. "Eff you."

Emma glared at Regina one last time before yanking the phone out of her hand and holding it up to her ear.

"This is Swan."

"Em, I left. I couldn't sit there anymore."

"What? August, where are you?"

"I talked to them and everything's fine. Nothing's weird. We're good."

"It doesn't work that way, Auggie," she sighed. "They know you're my brother."

"But they also know you arrested me and that made it seem like I hated you. That's good, right?"

"No, no, no. It doesn't work that way!"

"Shut up for a minute! Look, I know where the shipment's going to."

"I don't give a shit about the shipment! Just get your ass back here now!"

"I gotta stick around or they'll know something's up. Just trust me, I'm trying to do the right thing here."

Regina grabbed the phone back from Emma, "August? What's going on?"

"Don't talk to her!" Emma yelled.

"The shipment's coming to Boston Harbor Shipyard at 11:00. It's a big freight, tons of guys."

"I got it."

"They'll be heavily armed. You got to be careful, you hear me? The ship is called the S.S. Tank or some shit like that."

"I promise we'll be there."

"I got to go."

The phone call disconnected without another word.

Emma shook her head, scowling.

"You just made my brother a dead man."

"No," Regina reached out to take Emma's hand but she pulled it away. "He's gonna be fine." Meeting Emma's icy gaze and silence Regina tried to reassure her, "Emma, I swear. He'll be fine. We're gonna have the full power of the Boston FBI down on that terminal tonight. I promise you, he'll be fine." Emma just scoffed. "It really is a good thing. You'll thank me."

"Shut up."

.

.

.

That night Emma, Regina, Maleficent, Whale, Beastly, a dozen Boston FBI field agents, and a SWAT Team raided a boat full of innocent civilians.

After the waste of time search Maleficent pulled Regina aside.

"Well? The boat's clean. Oh wait," she scoffed, "I'm sorry. One girl had a joint in her purse. What a wonderful use of resources and manpower. Do you understand what kind of mess this is now?"

"Ma'am, we just have to hit the streets again and if the shipment comes in--"

"Mills! Enough. It's over. I'm sending you back to New York."

"Mal, no! Please! I'm telling you, I'm so close. This was just a little hiccup."

"This wasn't just a little hiccup, Regina."

"I'm sorry," she said, tears in her eyes and hands out pleading.

"Don't. Don't even." Maleficent muttered and walked away.

All Regina wanted was to turn to Emma. To say she was sorry for putting August in danger for nothing. To cry about disappointing her boss and jeopardizing her career. To lament being sent back to New York, away from the blonde she had grown so fond of. Turning, she expected to find Emma nearby and she frowned when she didn't spot her.

She stopped a field agent walking by, "Have you seen Detective Swan?"

"Hospital. Some kind of family emergency."

"Oh god."

.

.

.

She ran around the corner and saw Emma sitting in a chair several feet away from August's hospital room, the rest of the family arguing near his door. The blonde looked up when she heard running and sighed noticing it was Regina. She couldn't hide her red-rimmed eyes so she just sniffled. Regina would know she had been crying anyway.

She took the seat next to the blonde and quietly waited.

"He's in an induced coma. They shot him and left him out in the street."

"I'm so sorry, Emma." She placed her hand over the blonde's. "I'm sorry."

"He was trying to move on. He had a job interview. I saw the resume." She chuckled, wiping her eyes. "It was a terrible resume. He mentioned prison and in Special Skills he said, 'Keeping it real'. But he was trying, you know?"

"How's your family holding up?"

"They're not talking to me. Blame me now more than ever."

"It's not your fault."

"Yes, it is. Damn it! I should have handled it by myself," she wiped angrily at the tears that kept falling and stood up, walking away.

"So that's it?" Regina called out, her voice cracking and tears threatening to fall from her own eyes. "I'm not your..." she didn't even know how to define them, "I'm not your partner anymore?"

Emma turned back around, "No, you're not. You're not my anything anymore," she said firmly. "You're another fucking disappointment." She shook her head and marched over to her family. "I just want you to know that I'm gonna find the man responsible for this."

.

.

.

"Hey," Regina said, knocking on Graham's cubicle, the box of files he had given her on her first day on the job in her hands. "I'll give these back to you. Thank you so much for your help."

"Anytime," he smiled. "We're gonna miss you around here."

Regina laughed mirthlessly, "I don't think so."

"I might," he smiled again. "You did a good job out there."

She shook her head, "Goodbye, Junior Agent Humbert."

She gave him a small wave before turning around and heading for the elevator that would take her down to the lobby, out of the Boston field office, and back to New York. Rounding a corner, she heard voices coming from a conference room and recognized the one currently speaking as belonging to Maleficent. Peeking in the room she could see Maleficent, Whale, and Beastly standing in front of a projector, briefing a room full of agents.

"We sent out alerts to airports, train stations. DEA's gonna take the lead on this one. Although this is a joint task force, we're also working with the Boston P.D."

Whale pointed to his partner, "Adam and I will be handpicking all the officers so we don't wind up with this." Pushing the button on a remote brought up an image on the screen. Emma's mugshot. The room broke out in hearty laughs. "Any questions?"

Regina couldn't just stand back and let them laugh at Emma or pretend she hadn't heard or seen what was going on in that conference room. She pushed the door open, barging into the meeting.

"Hey," she pointed at the screen. "That's not right."

Whale looked back at the image on the screen and laughed again, "No, it's not."

Regina scowled, "That officer you're making fun of, the one that you're all laughing at...she has more integrity, more commitment, more courage, and more guts than anybody in this room."

"Yeah," Whale scoffed, "but less mental stability."

The agents laughed again but Maleficent shot him a warning glance.

"So just to be clear," Regina snarked with a roll of her eyes, "what does mental instability look like? Keeping people safe? Protecting the community? Getting the job done? Is that what it looks like? Then great. If that's what it looks like, sign me up for the crazy house! That officer right there is a better law enforcement officer than anybody in this room, myself included. She is better than you," she pointed at Whale, "she is better than you," she pointed at Beastly, "and she is definitely better than you," she sighed at an agent who was ignoring the conversation for his phone. "What are you doing? Are you texting? Playing a game? What is it? Put it away!" The agent jumped to attention, almost dropping his phone in his rush to stuff it in his pocket. "God, what is the matter with you? Fuck all of you!"

She slammed the door behind her as she stormed out, missing the look of mixed amusement and approval on Maleficent's face.

.

.

.

Emma took a deep breath outside the door of a well known drug house, bounced slightly on the balls of her feet, then turned and raised her foot, kicking the door in. Seeing only one visible suspect who was seated in the kitchen cutting cocaine and weighing it with a scale on the table in front of him, she pointed her gun at him and yelled.

"Get on the ground!" The suspect dropped to his knees, hands in the air. "You're under arrest! Get down on your stomach, put your hands behind your back, and tell me where the fuck Hook is!"

"I think it'd be much more better if you put your hands up," a voice behind her said and the barrel of a gun was pushed to the back of her head.

Emma swore under her breath and put her hands up, but before the perp could take the gun from her loose grip a new voice was heard in the doorway.

"Much more better?" Regina scoffed, pushing her own gun barrel against the man's head. "Drop the gun and take a grammar course, you idiot."

"Who the fuck are you?" the man questioned incredulously, dropping his gun to the floor.

Emma turned at the sound of the brunette's voice, pointing her gun at the man between them as well.

"Me and her," Regina smirked at Emma, "we're the fuckin' heat." Emma grinned at her before stepping back to cuff the suspect on the floor while Regina cuffed the man in front of her. "All right," she smiled at Emma, "we've got some scumbags to visit, huh?"

Emma laughed, "Yeah, we do!"

.

.

.

After raiding a warehouse, another drug house, and a dealer in the park, Emma and Regina had finally found some useful information leading them to a new distributor. They knocked on the door, guns drawn.

"Shit," Neal whined once he opened the door and realized who it was.

"Guess who," Emma smirked.

"Come on, Em!" he yelled when she pushed her way inside, Regina following close behind. "I don't know what you're doing here! I'm out of the game. You know what I hate? Drugs. I'm a different man!" It took Regina 30 seconds to reach the kitchen, open the freezer door and pull out a large bag of cocaine. Her eyebrow raised and she threw it at him, "This is not mine. I just bought that fridge the other day. It must have been in there."

Emma grabbed the bag of coke from his hands, hitting him over the head with it.

"We want to know where all this new shit is coming from. Is it Hook?"

"Em, what part of 'I'm out' do you not understand? I'm out!"

Emma and Regina shared a glance.

"You want to interview him?"

"No," Regina smiled mischievously. "No, I think I have something better in mind."

Emma grabbed his arm, twisting it behind his back and making him yell out from the sharp pain in his shoulder. Regina stepped around them and opened the door to the balcony, motioning for Emma to escort him outside to the fire escape. Once outside they shared a glance and a wordless conversation before bending and quickly flipping him upside-down over the railing, each holding him by an ankle, dangling him high in the air over the alley below.

"What the fuck!" he screamed. "I don't know shit! Come on!"

"I don't know," Emma drawled, "you're getting awfully heavy, Neal."

"Yeah," Regina agreed. "Lie to me again, Mr. Cassidy. I want to feel your body sliding through my delicate hands."

"I don't know _shit_!"

"Whoa," Emma shook the leg she was holding, "I can't hold you!"

"No, no, no, no! I don't want to die!" He screamed in frustration, "Okay, okay! It's at a warehouse on Summer Street!"

"I'm almost disappointed! Okay," she told Emma in a quieter tone, "let's pull him up."

They both pulled on his legs, struggling to pull him back over the railing.

"I'm not kidding anymore," Emma grunted. "I really can't lift him up."

Neal squirmed, panic kicking in and his limbs flailed.

"Lift my ass up!"

"I've only done this one other time," Emma admitted, "and it was a really tiny hooker."

"You don't fucking put somebody over a rail if you can't fucking lift them up!"

"Okay," Regina tried to make her voice sound calm. "Umm, you need to... Just tuck your head and relax your body."

"Lady, what the fuck?!"

Neal's continued squirming added to his weight they were already struggling with pulling over, until he finally started to slip through the pair's fingers.

"Crap!" Regina grimaced, knowing what was coming. "Crap!"

He slid out of their grasp, falling on the hood of an SUV in the alley below, denting it with a loud thud. Emma and Regina winced and groaned in unison, knowing that landing had to hurt.

"That was on me," Emma yelled down to Neal. "I take that."

"Thank you," Regina gave him a thumbs-up he couldn't see. "Thank you again!"

He coughed, "I hope this isn't my car."

"He's all right, right?" Regina asked Emma. "That...metal car broke his fall."

The blonde waved her hand dismissively, "Yeah."

"He'll shake it off," Regina nodded in agreement though she wasn't convinced.

"Oh, shit!" Neal yelled again, having rolled over and realizing he had, in fact, dented his own car. "My 2003!"

"Let's load up," Emma instructed, leading Regina away.

.

.

.


	5. Conclusions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've reached the end! I have some other movie aus I posted on FF I've considered bringing over as well and I need to focus more of my energy on my original fic posted to AO3. Let me know if the old movie stuff is of any interest to you or if you have any other requests. Thanks for following and for the comments!

Emma and Regina went to the blonde's apartment to stock up on weapons. Emma filled a backpack with guns, extra ammunition, and the grenade Regina had noticed in the freezer on the first day they met.

"No, no, no, no, no," Regina shook her head adamantly. "You said that thing ticks."

"Yeah, but not for days."

Emma put on a bulletproof tactical vest and handed a matching one to Regina, who was loading a shotgun.

"Do I even want to know where you got all this?"

Emma shook her head with a smirk.

"You hungry? I got a sandwich I didn't finish."

"The same sandwich you offered me a week ago?"

"It's grilled cheese," Emma scoffed. "Cheese doesn't go bad."

.

.

.

The pair arrived at the warehouse on Summer Street that Neal had told them about, quietly sneaking in a service entrance. They made their way through the deserted looking building, searching for any sign of suspects or clues. In the distance, two men could be seen talking, holding machine guns casually at their sides, a table behind them littered with multiple cans of baby formula.

"Baby formula?" Emma whispered to the brunette by her side.

"Cartels have been smuggling cocaine in baby formula for years," Regina explained quickly in a whisper of her own.

"Two of them, two of us," Emma said with a wink.

"I like those odds."

They stalked out from behind the crates they were using for cover, Emma taking the lead.

"Boston PD!"

"FBI!"

Emma motioned to the floor with a nod of her head, "Get down on the ground!"

"That's right," Regina told them as they dropped to their knees. "On your stomach, hands behind your head. Hurry up."

Just then, four more armed guards appeared from the shadows and immediately pointed their weapons at Emma and Regina, effectively out-flanking them.

"You guys all coming back from break at the same time?" Emma snarked.

Robin Locksley strolled in, taking his place in front of his six men, brandishing a weapon of his own.

"Unfortunate," he said with a chuckle, cocking the hammer on his gun. He couldn't help but goad them, "You two get less attractive every time I see you. Put the fucking guns down."

"No thanks," Emma grumbled immediately. "Nice entrance, Teen Wolf. I've held someone at gunpoint for 72 hours before. Let's go."

Regina held her hands up, "We need to do what he says."

Emma's head whipped to the side to glare at her.

"What?!"

"It's our best option. What are we going to do, shoot our way out of this? Put the gun in the bag."

"No, hold your gun up!"

"Just give them the bag! Give them everything!"

"God damn you," Emma pulled the backpack off her shoulders with a huff. "I thought you had my back."

She opened up the backpack and dumped her gun inside, then held it while Regina did the same. 

"Slide it over," Robin ordered. "Now!"

Regina took the bag from Emma, sliding it across the floor so it landed in front of Robin, coming to rest touching the toes of his boots.

"I guess we're engaged now," Regina remarked, totally confusing Robin.

"Huh?"

She held up a hand and the circular ring holding the grenade's key pin dangled from her pointer finger, "You just gave me a ring, motherfucker!"

"Oh, shit!" Robin yelled as the explosion went off.

.

.

.

Emma had tackled Regina at the last second, throwing their bodies behind a stack of crates for some minor cover. They didn't hear the sound of footsteps approaching, their ears still ringing from the blast as they tried to pull a piece of wood off Regina's leg. They both startled at the sound of a whistle behind them.

"Nice work," one of Robin's men said sarcastically.

Emma groaned, "How many of you are there?"

.

.

.

Emma and Regina were restrained side by side, sat in flimsy chairs and tied with constricting rope cutting into their arms and legs. They shared matching frowns when Killian Jones practically waltzed into the room, a smug smile on his face.

"How funny," Hook said with a chuckle. "This is like when you were interrogating me, only now _you're_ tied up..." he approached a workbench across from where they were tied up and unrolled a carrying case, "...and _I've_ got all these knives. You know, I don't like to shoot people, I like cutting people up," he ran a finger along the knives in his collection, "it's kind of what I do." Pulling out the smallest blade, he held it up for them to see. "You like this, love?"

Emma nodded her head yes, but replied sarcastically.

"That's a good, small one. Good choice. Not too flashy."

"This is actually an oyster shucking knife," he informed them, ignoring Emma's remarks, then quirked an eyebrow and smirked. "Either of you ladies need your oyster shucked?"

"Not at the moment."

"Not me."

"I've got to tell you. I've done this a lot of times to a lot of people, but you two...you're gonna be the most fun." The smirk was wiped off his face and replaced with an annoyed glare when another man entered the room. "What? This had better be important, mate."

"Rumpelstiltskin's here."

"Rumpel?"

"Upstairs."

Hook snapped his fingers in mock disappointment.

"The fun will have to wait. The boss is here. Would you please excuse me for a moment, ladies?"

"Yeah, take your time."

"Wonderful. Oh, also, would you mind holding this for me, love?"

He held the knife out to Emma.

"Well, my hands are tied," she glared at him, "but if you let me go I would be more than happy to take that from you."

"Right," Hook hit his forehead with the palm of his hand. "Your hands are tied. Well, let me help you then."

Without warning he turned and stabbed Regina in the leg, leaving the blade sticking out of her thigh, buried in her flesh up to the hilt.

"Jesus!"

All Regina could do was whimper.

"Thanks," Hook said with a wink, following the man who had come to get him out of the room.

"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" Regina whined, her entire body shaking while Emma tried to calm her with hushing noises. "Breathe through the pain," Regina told herself, taking deep, choking gasps of air.

"Breathe it out," Emma instructed, feeling helpless watching the brunette suffer. "Breathe it out."

"Detective Swan, if we should perish--"

Emma immediately interrupted her, "We're not gonna--"

"Just shh!" Regina took another deep breath, "I know I'm not very good with my feelings, but I need to tell you something. Okay? You are beautiful and funny and brave and...you are smart. You are smart and you are intuitive and you're the best cop I've ever worked with. And you were right. I went back and looked at the evidence and...I think the Fairy Tale Killer is innocent."

Emma's eyes widened in surprise, "Did you happen to mention that to anybody before you put yourself in a life-threatening situation?"

"No! No, I didn't!" Regina yelled, the pain of her wound and the guilt she was feeling now unbearable.

"Jesus! Good luck...you're taking that to your grave probably."

Regina groaned and started hopping in her chair, crying out with near sobs, trying to get it to turn directions so Emma's hands that were restrained at her sides would be positioned close enough to Regina's leg for the blonde to pull the knife out.

"Grab the knife," she told Emma who had hesitated, not wanting to hurt her. "Take it! Just take it!"

"I'm sorry," Emma said with a grimace, wrapping her fingers firmly around the hilt and ripping the blade from Regina's flesh in as quick of a motion as she could manage. Regina screamed out in pain, the sound echoing off the walls around them as Emma slid the blade against the ropes, cutting herself free. "Shh, it'll be okay. I'm almost out and then you're next," she tried to calm the brunette who was breathing so deeply through clenched teeth it sounded like she was on the verge of a panic attack. "Got it!" she said in triumph, the ropes around both hands sliding free.

Just as she bent down to work the ropes around her feet a door was heard banging shut in the distance.

"Hurry up, hurry up, hurry up..." Regina stopped talking when footsteps were heard coming closer, and stared deeply in Emma's eyes. "Somebody's coming. You have to put it back in."

"What?!" Emma hissed.

"You have to put it back in," Regina said again, keeping her eyes locked on Emma's, willing the blonde to do as she was told, "and put your hands behind your back. When he gets close, grab him."

Emma locked her jaw and steeled her gaze, wordlessly nodding _yes_ , she would do it, the look on her face showing _no_ , she was not okay with it.

Not wanting to risk blindly stabbing at Regina a second time and making a new wound, she pressed the blade slowly back into the original point of entry as Regina groaned and white-knuckled her chair, biting her tongue to keep from yelling out.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Emma repeated before tenderly kissing Regina's temple.

"Motherfucker," Regina finally whispered shakily, staring at the blade that was once again embedded in her leg.

She shook her head trying to physically clear her mind of the pain and hopped weakly on her chair to shift it back to her original position beside the blonde.

"It'll be okay," Emma whispered. "I'll pretend to keep my hands tied."

She tucked her hands behind her back as the footsteps finally got close enough to carry two DEA agents in the door.

"Oh, no, Scoob!" Whale mocked, "Velma and Daphne got captured!"

Regina chuckled weakly, "I never thought I'd be happy to see you two."

"We need to get her to the hospital!"

"Did you call this in?" Beastly asked, making Emma scowl.

"Yeah, I sent a fucking owl with a note. How did you even know we were here?"

"We followed you," Whale explained easily with a shrug. "I knew you wouldn't give up easily, especially not after they greased your shitbag brother."

"Fuck you," Emma glared at him. "It takes a lot more than Rumpelstiltskin to take down someone in my family."

Beastly had been knelt in front of Regina, cutting the restraints at her feet loose but at Emma's words his head whipped up and his hands stilled.

"August isn't dead?"

"Come on, Adam," Whale tried to rush him to get back to his task. "Rumpelstiltskin is on his way."

Emma ignored Whale and frowned at Beastly's odd behavior.

"What is this, a fucking Q and A? Can we do this later?"

"Wait," he stood up, looking stressed. "Did he talk to the police? Did he see Rumpel?"

"How is she supposed to know?" Regina grumbled. "He's been in a coma. Untie my leg."

Beastly ignored her, "That's too bad. Where is he? Is he at Boston General?"

"Why? You gonna send fucking flowers?"

"Why are you so..." the brunette's eyes widened when suddenly everything clicked. "Oh my god."

"You piece of shit," Emma seethed.

"You guys are working with Rumpelstiltskin."

Beastly sighed, "I really wish you hadn't said that."

"Said what?" Whale asked, looking between them, not noticing his partner had lifted his weapon, firing a single shot and killing him instantly.

"Ah, that felt good," Beastly said with a chuckle.

"Shit," Emma gasped in shock. "It wasn't Marky Mark, it was the Funky Bunch. I feel bad."

Beastly nodded, "He wasn't working for Rumpel, he just wanted you off the case because he's a misogynistic asshole."

"Why are you doing this?" Regina questioned aloud. "You getting some kind of payoff?"

"Would it help you figure things out if I told you my name isn't really Adam Beastly?" he asked with an evil smile. "It's Adam Gold."

"You own The Gold Club," Regina's jaw dropped at her next revelation. "You're Rumpelstiltskin."

"Holy shit," Emma gaped.

"Ta-da!"

"I heard a gunshot," Hook yelled, running back in the room. "What the..." he saw feet before realizing who was sprawled out on the floor. "Whale? Christ, that's a shame. That guy was hilarious!" Sombering he turned to Rumpelstiltskin, "I don't think that was such a good idea, mate."

Rumpelstiltskin rolled his eyes, "You spend three years in a van with him, you'd kill him, too. We'll pin it on Locksley. I've got to go to the hospital to finish August, you deal with these two. No loose ends." Noticing Emma's glare he shrugged, "We told you to stay out of the way."

As Rumpelstiltskin left, Hook wandered back to the workbench where he'd left his knives set up, not noticing Emma's hands she held behind her back were still untied.

"I've been waiting to do this a long time," he turned back to them holding a large knife. "Ugly duckling. I'm afraid you're up first, love."

"Please don't hurt us," Emma begged as Hook stalked closer. "Please. I didn't mean to say the shit I said. Don't hurt us."

Once he was close enough, Emma lunged forward, pulling the knife from Regina's leg and cutting a deep gash across Hook's thigh, causing him to stumble and fall. Emma leaned down, quickly cutting the restrains around her feet and pushed herself back as Hook stood back up. When he charged at the blonde, Regina threw her weight against the arm of her chair, knocking it over and tripping Hook with her body as his feet collided with her torso. The knife fell from his hands and slid across the floor where Emma grabbed it quickly.

"Emma, gun at two-thirty!" Regina yelled, catching Emma's attention in enough time for the blonde to pivot and throw the knife at the gunman now running in, stabbing him in the chest.

She ran for the gun, picking it up quickly but not in enough time. Hook had pulled Regina's chair upright and was leaned behind her, using her as a shield and holding a knife to her throat.

"You take one step and your partner gets it."

Regina knocked her head back, trying to hit him in the face like she had seen Emma do to Locksley. Hook crumpled to the floor behind her.

"Oh, shit," she groaned.

"Nice," Emma praised, then held Regina by the jaw, holding her head still and trying to make her eyes focus. "Look at me. Are you okay?"

Regina swayed gently but her eyes were starting to come uncrossed.

"I feel like I'm gonna throw up," she whined.

"That was a really bad head-butt," Emma grimaced. "It was good...but you're gonna feel it." She knelt before the brunette and placed a gentle kiss to her forehead, "Let's get you untied, then we're gonna go get August."

.

.

.

"Why won't they answer the fucking phone?!" Emma yelled in frustration.

She skid to a stop at the hospital emergency entrance doors and Regina waved her away.

"Go, go, go!"

She jumped out of the car and ran inside, Regina bracing herself with a whimper as she tried to hobble her way to a wheelchair she spotted through the doors. When she dropped her body into the seat several nurses rushed over to try and help put her on a stretcher but she pulled her gun out, waving it at them.

"I got it, thank you," she shooed them away, trying to wheel herself down the hall where she could hear Emma yelling. "Just call 911!"

"Where is my brother, you asshole?!" Emma yelled at a doctor outside August's now empty hospital room.

"Okay," he rolled his eyes, "it's that kind of language from your family that forced us to move him to the east wing."

Emma pushed him as she ran past, "Move, dipshit! August, I'm coming!"

She ran until she reached the room with his name outside the door, pushing it open and gasping for air, hoping she wasn't too late. But there was August, asleep in his bed, the monitors next to him beeping normally. When she walked further into the room, Rumpelstiltskin popped out from behind the door, hitting her in the back of the head with the butt of his gun, instantly knocking her to the ground in a heap as he kicked her gun away.

She sat up and leaned back against the door, head spinning. On instinct, she reached behind to touch the source of the throbbing pain and pulled her hand back, red on her fingertips.

Rumpelstiltskin pulled a syringe from his pocket, gun still aimed at Emma as he approached August's IV line.

"It's amazing what a little air in the bloodstream does to the human heart. You may not want to watch this."

A crash outside startled them both and they looked up to see a wheelchair zipping down the hallway before Regina skid in the open door, slamming against it beside Emma, sitting on the floor facing the hospital bed and Rumpelstiltskin with the syringe frozen in midair.

"Drop it!" Regina yelled, her gun pointed directly at him. "Do it now or I will fire this weapon!"

"Or I inject--"

Rumpelstiltskin started to try and bargain with her but Regina wasn't having it. She fired her gun and he crumpled to the floor.

Instantly the weight of the day came crashing down on her and she let her head fall back against the door, closing her eyes and taking deep breaths. Emma wrapped her arm around her shoulder and pulled her closer, pressing a kiss to her temple and closing her eyes as well.

"You did good, babe," she praised Regina, her words mumbled with her lips still pressed to the brunette hair. "You saved August's life."

.

.

.

Maleficent found Emma helping Regina limp down the hall where the brunette had previously rolled herself in a wheelchair at a crazy speed before flinging her body out and sliding in the door to save the blonde detective and her brother.

"Internal Affairs is going to open a top-to-bottom investigation of every department now," Maleficent informed them before nodding at Regina. "Nice work."

"Well," Regina winced and leaned more of her weight into Emma, "it was a team effort, ma'am."

Maleficent nodded, "We also put out an APB on Hook."

"Oh," Emma scoffed. "Don't bother. He's in the trunk."

She started to walk away again but Regina stopped her.

"Oh, and, ma'am...we're going to have to reopen the Fairy Tale Killer case."

Maleficent frowned in confusion but Emma just steered them away before giving Regina a gentle squeeze on the hip she was holding to keep her upright.

"Good for you," she told her sincerely, affection deep in her voice.

"I thought that would feel good," Regina whined, "but it felt awful."

"It might feel bad for awhile, but I'm glad you did it. And I know you are too." She directed Regina to an empty stretcher, "Let's take this one. Get up here."

Regina scowled, "Is this clean?"

"It's clean enough," Emma huffed before lifting Regina up and gently helping her take a seat. "Lay back."

"No. It smells like several people died on here. Let me just sit. I don't need to be on my back."

Emma smirked, "The sooner you get fixed up and out of here the sooner i can make it worth your while to be on your back."

Regina rolled her eyes but she couldn't hide the faint pink tint creeping on her cheeks.

"If you just let me sit, I can still do this."

She tugged Emma closer by her belt until she was standing between the brunette's open legs.

"Watch the leg..." Emma started to lecture her with a frown but it quickly died out when Regina pulled her into a deep kiss, tangling her hands in blonde curls.

"I want this place locked down, people!" Graham shouted as he walked confidently in the hospital doors, causing Regina and Emma to groan and pull apart. "Nobody goes in or out without talking to me!" Glancing back, he saw the agents who had followed him in, "I want you three stationed at each end of the east wing. Let's go! Let's clear this hallway, people!" Pointing at two other agents with his walkie talkie he gave them instructions too. "You two, get the press out of here." He finally seemed to notice the women in front of him. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good," Regina said with a small smile.

"I knew you would be," he chuckled before calling over a nurse. "Excuse me? This woman is one of the best agents in the FBI. Make sure she's well taken care of. All right?"

The nurse nodded and he winked at Regina before walking away, giving orders to another agent.

"That was...interesting," Regina said with a laugh.

"Yeah," Emma agreed, frowning. "Very interesting."

Regina smirked, "Jealous."

Emma narrowed her eyes, ready to argue, but instead of denying it like she had with Robin in the club, this time she merely embraced it with a shrug.

"Maybe."

Regina's smirk turned mischievous and she slipped her fingers under Emma's tactical vest and t-shirt, tickling the smooth skin and tight muscles of her stomach with her fingertips before tugging her closer by the belt again for another kiss.

"Ahem," the nurse Graham had given orders to cleared his throat, breaking them apart again.

Emma huffed at having to pull away from Regina's lips again, "Fine." She helped the brunette lay back on the stretcher and the nurse started pushing it down the hallway. "All right, let's go," she followed along dutifully.

The nurse looked over at her, "Are you next of kin?"

"I'm her partner." He looked between them, then at their bare ring fingers and Emma rolled her eyes. "I meant partner in law enforcement, not in life, dumbass."

"Then you need to stay here."

Emma frowned but didn't argue, watching him wheel the brunette away.

"I'll wait right here for you!"

Regina waved her away, "Throw out that sandwich!"

"I'll bring you that sandwich!"

"No! Throw it out!"

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.

.

When Captain David Nolan presented Emma Swan with the medal for outstanding service two weeks later, Regina Mills was there in the back of the room with the blonde's family, proudly supporting her. Granny even brought flowers and Kristoff and Lily cheered as loudly as Ruby did. Emma didn't know how Regina was able to organize her crazy family or make them somewhat behave at a formal police function, but when the brunette beamed at her onstage she was glad everyone she cared about was in the room, especially that brunette. Her heart felt like it was ready to burst and her eyes misted over. She gave Regina a nod of appreciation and a wink meaning she would thank her properly later.

.

.

.

A week later, the family got the call they had been waiting for. August was awake.

"It was just a little snooze," he said with a lazy smile. "I wasn't hurt that bad. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be."

Emma rolled her eyes before lifting a piece of cake that Granny had baked and brought for this special occassion.

"I move to cake-toast to Auggie!"

"Yeah!"

"To August!"

"Yeah, Gus!"

Granny cleared her throat, "May I have your attention? I wanted you to have this." She picked up a framed oil painting and handed it to Emma. "It was your grandfather's. He would have been very proud of you for taking care of your brother."

"That's awesome," Ruby laughed at the framed painting of Jesus midair playing basketball, making a slam dunk. "Take a picture."

Emma cringed and the rest of her siblings started teasing her too.

"Are you serious?" Kristoff burst into laughter. "Dunkin' Jesus?"

"Take a picture! Come on, Em!"

Emma laughed and smiled, one arm holding the painting up, the other wrapped around Granny's shoulders.

"Are you happy you fucking delinquents?" She pushed the painting into Kristoff's arms. "Hold onto that. I need to make a call."

She stepped out into the hallway for some privacy and unlocked her phone when a nurse walked by, frowning at her and pointing with the pen in her hand.

"No cell phones."

Emma merely pushed her leather jacket aside revealing the badge on her hip, "How about now?" She removed the gun from her shoulder holster, pointing it at the nurse who immediately held up her hands, "Oh, different story?" When the nurse started to back away without further complaint, Emma couldn't resist continuing to torment her. "Aw, come on back!" Rolling her eyes at the retreating figure she put her gun away and leaned against the wall, pressing the call button next to the familiar contact number on the screen and holding the phone to her ear.

"Mills."

"Hey it's me," Emma said, the smile on her face evident in her tone. "So, you getting all settled in your new digs?"

"Yeah, they're pretty sweet. Who needed that promotion anyway? I'm glad I stayed around where all the action is. We've got a lot of scumbags to take down here in Boston, Detective Swan."

Emma chuckled, something she found herself doing more of these days.

"Yeah, we do."

"There's also a certain blonde I would hate to have to say goodbye to."

"She sounds hot," Emma smiled again at the sound of Regina's laugh. She fidgeted and scuffed the floor with the toe of her boot before stuffing her free hand in her back pocket, suddenly feeling very shy and nervous. "Hey...did you get that package I sent?"

She could hear Regina shuffling papers around on the other end of the phone.

"Oh, I haven't opened it yet. I'm sorry. Granny sent me something too, so this is quite the gift day from your family."

"Shut the fuck up," Emma chuckled in shock.

"I swear! It's a framed oil painting of Jesus playing hockey. Very aggressive slapshot going on."

"How the fuck do you know what a slapshot is?" Emma asked with a smirk.

"I don't profess to know everything, but I do know quite a bit," the brunette reminded her, and this time she was right.

"Whatever you say, Rosetta Stone."

Emma could hear the box being cut open before Regina asked curiously, "My yearbook?"

"I signed it in the front," she admitted shyly.

"Does that mean you broke into my house again," Regina teased.

"I don't need to break in anymore, dumbass. But I may or may not have made a detour on the way out of your bedroom at one point."

"I see," Regina drawled, then huffed when she saw what Emma had written. "Very funny."

**Fucking NERD  
-Det. Swan**

Emma could practically feel the glare over the phone line and it made her laugh.

"I was just kidding," she laughed again. "Look at the back."

"Oh, did you write something else mean and profanity-laden?"

**I love you.  
-Emma**

She could hear Regina's soft intake of breath and knew at least one tear was rolling down the brunette's cheek.

"Well...don't make it weird," she tried joking to make Regina laugh again. "Later, nerd."

"Wait!" Regina yelled out, stopping Emma from hanging up. "Are you busy right now, dear?"

"No," the question caught Emma by surprise. "I'm on my way out of the hospital. Why, what's up?"

"I was thinking maybe you could stop by, see the new office."

"Oh," Emma shrugged. It was an odd request but she didn't mind saying yes. "Yeah, sure."

"I can order in lunch for you..." Regina dropped her voice and husked, "and then I can lock the door and have you for mine."

Emma gulped, "Th-That sounds nice."

Regina hummed in agreement, "I think it would be _very_ nice if you picked me up...sat me on my desk...pushed my skirt up around my hips...and fucked me with your fingers."

"Mm," Emma's eyes closed. "Yeah. Yup. V-very nice."

"It really would be," Regina sighed wistfully. "Just about as nice as _you_ will feel after I push you into my chair and pull your skinny jeans down around your ankles."

"You would be the nicest...to do something like that," Emma croaked.

"How long till you get here?" She lowered her voice, "I'm starving."

Emma stood up from where she had been leaning, moving too quickly and bumping into the wall.

"I'm on my way."

Regina chuckled, "Oh, and, Emma?"

"Yeah, babe?"

"I love you, too."

**THE END**


End file.
